Brave Hearts
by MycatISLordTubbington
Summary: No Amity has ever successfully completed Dauntless initiation, but perhaps they just never had the right motivation. AU with OC's.
1. Prologue

**A/N: Wow, so, look, I wrote a thing….he he. This is my first Divergent fic, and also the first AU/OC fic I've ever written. I guess a few things to know**

**1\. I do not own the world of divergent, tobias eaton, tris prior, jeanie matthews, eric, or any of Veronica Roth's other characters that may appear in this story. **

**2\. I do however own Lily, Gideon, Xavier, Sarah, Carla, and any other OCs you might see. Although I do have to give credit to my gf Kaitlin (who does ****not have an ff account, idk why) for helping me create Lily. If reading this makes you want to borrow them, please ask, I like sharing. ****  
**

**3\. Lily and Gideon are meant to be one year older than Tris, except in the prequel, in the prequel they are 10 years old.**

_Prequel_

Lillian Abercrombie was not brave. She had been told this ever since her first day of school. The Dauntless are brave, the Amity are not, no Amity has ever completed Dauntless initiation. From her long blonde hair that went down to her waist, to her soft red and yellow dress, with one look you could tell, Lily Abercrombie would never be brave.

But she wished she could be, every day as she watched the Dauntless jumping from trains and climbing walls, she wished she had their courage.

"You're staring again" Sarah said. Sarah was Lily's cousin. A short thin girl with dark hair and a pinched face. Her mother, Lily's aunt, had transferred to Candor on her choosing day, so her daughter had a knack for making all observations out loud. "For the sake of honesty", she claimed, though Lily thought it was really just because her cousin had nothing better to talk about.

"I know" Lily said passively, "I like to watch them."

"Why? Aren't you supposed to hate them?"

"I'm not supposed to hate anyone. Besides, I think they're graceful, it reminds me of dancing, the way they move."

Sarah stared at the Dauntless for a moment before sneering "they look like a bunch of monkeys if you ask me."

A Dauntless boy, running past them, stopped in his tracks and turned towards Sarah, "You're just jealous." He said, "Candors walk around running their mouths acting like that makes them strong, but really you're just jealous that you're not brave like us."

"I am not!"

"Liar!"

Lily gasped, Sarah had been called a lot of names, all the Candor had, but no one would dare call one of them a liar. No one except this boy apparently.

His name was Gideon. He was tall for a 10 year old, with striking blue eyes and black hair. He dyed the tips of his hair a different color every week. Today they were silver.

"Don't fight guys, please." Lily whispered, cowering a little. By now a group had formed around the three of them, the whole fifth grade seemed to be gearing up for a fight.

Gideon's gaze darted between the two of them for a moment, "Aw whatever, you're not worth my time." the crowd around them groaned in disappointment.

"Come on Gideon," another Dauntless boy shouted, "don't give in that easy!"

"Hey," another one said, "if he won't show 'em who's boss, I will." The boy broke from the crowd and snatched Sarah's scarf from her shoulders.

Sarah grabbed at it, but this boy was taller than her. She stomped her foot "I'm telling the teacher!" she cried and ran off.

The boy turned towards Lily, "Are you gonna run away too pansycake?"

Lily straightened her back, standing up real tall the way she'd seen the Dauntless do before a fight, "Give it back" she said, trying to make her voice sound strong.

The crowd around her echoed with a chorus of jeers.

"You want it? Go get it!" The boy balled the scarf up and threw it high in the air, where it landed over the statue the Dauntless climbed. He smirked and walked over to the other Dauntless, who cheered and slapped his back as everyone headed back towards the school.

Soon only Lily was left, staring up at the structure.

"You may as well give up" a voice behind her said, she turned to see Gideon standing a few feet away, "even I can't climb that high, and I'm the best in the whole grade." The comment wasn't boastful, just a gentle fact.

"I can get it." Lily grabbed onto the first handhold of the structure.

"Are you crazy?" Gideon grabbed her shoulder, "you're gonna get killed!"

"No, I won't. I can do it. I've watched you all climb this thing for years, I know how to do it." Lily pulled her self up, climbing higher and higher. She tried to remember every Dauntless she'd seen climb the structure, every placement, everywhere they'd gone wrong. Below her she could still hear Gideon calling to her, and not long after Sarah's voice joined in, along with a teacher's voice telling her that if she didn't come down she'd be in trouble. But she couldn't go down now, she was almost there; and she definitely couldn't look down to tell them that. Lily grabbed the scarf and began her journey down the structure, searching her memory for ever step she'd taken to be sure she wouldn't miss one. Her arms were beginning to tremble and she silently thanked her mother for making sure she never missed a yoga class.

After what seemed like forever, Lily felt her feet touch solid ground, and seconds later there were hands all over her.

Sarah was hugging her and crying "You're such a dummy, how would I have told Auntie Steph you'd died trying to get my scarf, huh. You're completely insane and I'm so glad you're alive!" Meanwhile the teacher was checking her for injuries and muttering about "crazy Amities, don't know the difference between kindness and stupidity" and Gideon was ruffling her hair and going on and on about "so cool!" and "never seen anyone climb that high!"

Once they'd all calmed themselves, Lily handed the scarf to Sarah and smiled "I got it down for you."


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: First off, thank you so much to everyone who reviewed/followed/favorited, it's really the only thing that motivates me to keep posting (probably why my only completed stories are one-shots). I'm going to try and post a new chapter every week, but you know, life happens…but I'll try.**

**Also, I little disclaimer, I started this story concept before reading Insurgent or Allegiant so some things (like Amity) are going to be different than they are in the book. **

Six Years Later, 2 weeks until Choosing Day

Lily's heart pounded as she ran across the school yard. Her breath grew short and she shut out everything but the sound of her own feet hitting the pavement. She saw Gideon ahead, she had to catch him, she couldn't let him-

"I win!"

-beat her again. She reached the "finish line" a tall tree at the edge of the yard, where Gideon was stretching out and waiting for her.

"You so cheated."

"I did not." Gideon chuckled and ruffled her hair, "Aww, don't pout little Amity, you were so close that time."

"One day, Aserath, I swear one day I'll get you."

"You've been saying that for six years, give it six more and maybe it'll come true."

Lily scowled a little, but she couldn't argue, Gideon was right. For six years she could run longer and climb higher, but his long legs gave him an advantage when it came to speed.

"Why do you try so hard anyway?" He asked, "it's not like you need much physical training to live in Amity, unless you're planning to be a farmer."

"And what if I don't go into Amity?"

"You, not an Amity? I can't even imagine. You're too fun for Abnegation, and too nice for anything else, you are Amity through and through."

"Oh and you'd know? What are you psychic now?" The truth was, Lily knew she belonged in Amity, but as choosing day got closer she couldn't help wondering if she could live somewhere else. Gideon had been her best friend for six years, the idea of choosing a life that didn't include him seemed impossible. But then, so did choosing a faction where fighting and aggression were glorified.

Gideon wasn't like most Dauntless, he wasn't cocky or mean. He knew when to pick his battles, and always held true to the one part of the Dauntless manifesto that Lily admired; that the greatest act of courage was to stand up for the weak. Lily couldn't even think of a life without him.

"Race you back to the school!" Gideon took of like a shot and Lily raced after him, the two laughing and weaving around each other as they raced.

Gideon pushed as hard as he could, he knew Lily hated when he let her win, no matter how tempting it was. He had always admired her endurance, her need to prove herself. When he saw her run like this, her long blonde hair blowing out behind her and her long skirt wrapping around her legs, threatening to trip her, he couldn't help but forget the rest of the world around him. Which is why he was paying absolutely no attention to the pothole in the middle of the field and tripped right over it. He fell to the ground, summersaulting across the grass and landing on his back. For a moment the sun above blinded him before Lily's concerned face blocked it out.

"Gideon, are you OK?"

"Don't stop now, run, you've almost beaten me." He chuckled.

Lily laughed before helping him up, Gideon couldn't believe how soft her small hands were. "Come on," she laughed, "what kind of win would that be?"

And that...that is why I know you're an Amity."

"Well, that may be true, but now that your up..."Lily smirked, leaning in close and whispering in his ear "I'm still going to beat you."

Lily ran off and for a moment Gideon couldn't quite register what happened. He had always wondered if Lily did these things on purpose, or if she actually had no clue how seductive she could be. The thought only crossed his mind for a moment though, before he took of after his friend. After all, he couldn't give up that easy.


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: Whoa, what, two chapters in two days? Who am i and what have done with myself?**

**Again, thanks to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, and followed. You all really make my day.**

Test Day

Lily waited patiently in line for her name to be called. Around her, other Amities were gossiping, giggling, and even singing, but she couldn't be bothered with any of that right now. She wished she could've talked to Gideon before the test, but he she hadn't seen him all morning and now it was too late. She wished she could tell him everything, her fear of losing him after their Choosing, her hesitance to leave Amity, and her hesitance to stay. Recently the gentle vibe of Amity had just become so slow to Lily. She had always found peace in the calm relaxed nature of her fellow faction members, but now it felt like none of them really understood her. Her mother said it was natural for a teenager to feel misunderstood, but Lily didn't think her mother really understood that either.

"Lillian Abercrombie." Lily was pulled from her thoughts when her name was called and she stepped forward.

"That's me" she said meekly. The proctor called out a few more names, "Gideon Aserath" Gideon joined the group, "All of you follow me."

Gideon snuck over by Lily, "Nervous?" he asked.

"Why would I be? We both know where I belong." Did she though? Because right here with Gideon, that's were it felt like she belonged, and that couldn't be right.

Everyone lined up in front of the doors marked with their faction, she caught Gideon's eye just as the doors opened. He didn't look afraid at all, then again, he never did.

In the room was a reclined chair and an Abnegation man standing next to it.

"Lillian?" Lily nodded, "Come on in, don't be afraid. Have a seat and then drink this. The test will be quick and painless, then I'll deliver your results. Any questions?" The man's tone didn't exactly put Lily's mind at ease, but it was clear they both wanted this over with quickly, so she just shook her head and drank what he gave her.

Lily felt her eyes drift closed and when she next opened them the Abnegation man was gone and a table had been set up in front of her with a block of cheese and a knife on it. She heard a voice say, "Choose".

"Hello? Who's there?" Lily scrunched up in her chair.

"Choose!"

"OK, OK, fine." Lily wondered if maybe they intended to keep her locked up in here and for a moment the knife seemed a logical choice, but if she was about to be attacked, maybe seeming helpless would be an advantage. And, if she were just going to be left in here, she'd want something to eat. She took the cheese and the rest of the table and it's contents disappeared. The room was silent, she was alone.

Lily sat back in her chair, nibbling her cheese, when she heard a growling noise behind her. She spun her chair around to see a big black dog growling at her, it's ears pressed back and teeth bared. Lily spun her chair back around, hoping to hide from the dog, but she spun he was in front of her again. It couldn't be the same dog, she looked over shoulder and saw nothing. She spun her chair a little left and a little right, the dog kept moving to always be in front of her.

"That's weird," she thought, "dogs can't teleport...can they?" She was pretty sure they couldn't.

She looked at the dog more closely, he was thin, with matted fur, and she realized he wasn't looking at her, but the cheese in her hand.

"Poor thing, you're just hungry aren't you?" Lily slid out the chair to the floor and broke off a chunk of cheese, tossing it to the dog, who pounced and ate it happily before walking up and laying in front of her, whining pitifully.

"It's ok," she said petting his head and holding the cheese out, "we can share. I don't think I'll be here much longer anyway." The dog ate the last of the cheese and licked Lily's face, his tail wagging happily. She laughed and buried her face in his fur.

Then, the dog disappeared and Lily was back in the chair, with the bored Abnegation man messing with a screen in front of her.

"Congratulations," he said with no enthusiasm, though he tried to look pleasant "you're all Amity. You may go, and remember that all results are confidential, and not to be discussed."


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: Ok, so this is my 2nd time posting this same chapter. For any of you who already read it and are wondering why it's changed, I went back and Lily's character just didn't seem right, so I've changed a few things. Let me know what you think (that's my way of begging for reviews). Also it kind of just…grew. So now it's really long… Hope you all enjoy it =)**

Lily knew she should be happy, that there was no need to make any tough choices now, but all she wanted to do was scream. Or cry. Or punch something, she really couldn't decide. As she walked across the school yard she saw Gideon with his Dauntless friends, Xavier and Jackson, heading towards the trains.

She had to talk to him. Screw secrecy and screw making her own choices, she needed to talk about this and she needed to talk to him. She began to run, sprinting to close the distance between them, she made it onto the platform just in time to see the train zooming past.

"Gideon!" He couldn't hear her, the train was too loud. He had already begun jogging after it. As Lily saw him jump into the car she did the only thing she could think to; she ran faster and pulled herself into the train just before it left the platform. For a moment she was suspended in midair, her hands holding the handle at the door and her feet dangling, before she pulled herself into the car.

"I think you're a little early Amity" she heard a voice say, "initiation starts tomorrow."

She looked up to see Xavier looking down at her.

"Well come on then," he helped her up "Gideon's up at the front of the car."

Lily and Xavier nudged their way through the crowd towards the front of the car. Lily could see the top of Gideon's head, his signature blue hair tips sticking out over the crowd.

"Hey Gideon," Xavier said, "I brought you a present."

"Lily?" Gideon's eyes went wide, "How the hell did you get on here?"

"Same as you, I jumped." she smiled wide, feeling proud of herself.

"Are you crazy? You could've hurt yourself! What the hell Lily, people die trying to get on these things!"

"But I didn't" she could feel her smile growing wider as she realized what she had just done, "Besides, I needed to talk to you."

"About what? What could be so important you needed to jump on a train to tell me?"

Well, I..." Lily didn't know how to answer that. What could she say? _"I tested into Amity but I'm thinking of transferring anyway"_? _"I can't imagine a life without you so I'm thinking of leaving my home to be with you"_? _"I might be in love with you but I don't know I just know that you're my best friend and the thought of living without you makes me so sad and scared that I just want to throw a tantrum like a little child"_? None of those really sounded right, so instead she just put on her sweetest smile and said, "I just wanted to be sure you were still coming to my performance tonight."

That was not the right thing to say. Gideon looked like she had just said "_I just wanted to let you now I plan on growing an extra head tonight and was hoping you could braid it's hair for me". _Which, looking back, she may as well have.

"Ummm, yes, I'll be there..." Gideon was starting to smile a little, before he began just laughing out loud.

"What's so funny?" Lily asked.

Gideon pulled her into a hug and ruffled her hair, "You're crazy, you know that? Absolutely crazy."

"Yeah, guys, the hugging and stuff is all really gross and cute and everything but, we kinda gotta jump now." Xavier said from where he and Jackson were hovered by the train door.

Lily and Gideon pulled apart and prepared to jump.

"You sure to can handle this Amity?" Jackson shouted over the rush of the wind as they neared the platform.

"Well," Lily said, now questioning the logic of having gotten on in the first place, "I guess we're about to find out."

She felt Gideon grab her hand and squeeze it reassuringly, "On three, alright?"

Lily nodded stiffly, the idea of jumping from a moving train was a lot more frightening now that the adrenaline was out of her system.

"Ok," Gideon squeezed her hand tighter as the platform in the distance grew closer, "One, two, three!"

Lily saw Gideon leap out of the corner of her eye, for a moment she stiffed, forgetting how her body worked, and then she leapt. Her delay had pulled Gideon back a little and they both lost their balance when hitting the ground, tumbling over one another. as the sound of the train grew faint they could hear Xavier and Jackson clapping and whistling.

"Way to go guys," Jackson laughed, "great form."

"Maybe they fell on purpose," Xavier added, "I mean it's a decent way to get someone underneath you."

Gideon stood up, playfully smacking Xavier on the head before helping Lily up, "Are you all right, Lily?"

"Yeah, I'm OK." Lily hissed at a pain in her knee as she stood.

"No you're not," Gideon said, "You've scraped your leg halfway to hell. Here let me help." before Lily could protest, Gideon had lifted her up bridal style.

"Gideon, what are you doing?" She gripped his neck tightly, not really sure how she felt about being carried, though Gideon's arms were a pretty big comfort

"I'm carrying back to my apartment so we can bandage your leg up."

"I can walk" she pouted.

"I know that, but there is gravel and dirt and god knows what else in your leg and walking around on it will push those things in deeper and give you and infection which could lead to blood poisoning and possibly the loss of your leg, is that what you want?"

Lily just stared for a moment, "Wow, you're really smart. How do you know all that?"

"You go to the hospital enough times, you learn a few things."

Lily giggled, "You are pretty clumsy, I hope you don't drop me." She held tighter to him and buried her face in his neck. He smelled good, like really good. How had she not noticed until today how good he smelled? And his hair, his hair was so soft. Why hadn't she felt his hair until now?

"It's like a kitten."

"What?"

Oh god, had she said that out loud? OK, play it cool Lily, play it- "Your hair is soft like a kitten."

Xavier and Jackson nearly fell over each other laughing.

"Whoa, are you guys still here?" Lily swiveled her head around to look for them. "I thought you left ages ago to go like, hit each other, or whatever you guys do."

They got to Gideon's apartment and Xavier opened the door for them before he and Jackson left. Gideon walked to the couch and set Lily down.

"I'll be right back, I'm going get something to clean your leg with and some bandages. Don't go anywhere." Gideon smoothed her hair a little and left the room.

"But Gideon," she called out, "I've never been in your house before. How can you expect me to just sit here, I've got exploring to do."

"Explore when you're not crippled!" He called from the other room.

Gideon came back with a bottle of peroxide and a roll of bandages and knelt down in front of Lily.

"Is this the part were you ask me to marry you?" Lily joked.

"Haha," Gideon said, blushing, "give me your leg."

"No silly, you're supposed to ask for my hand."

Gideon rolled his eyes and said "Fine," he took her hand and said, "Lily Abercrombie, run away with me. We can get married and build a little house in the middle of the farms. We'll have 10 kids and raise chickens for a living. So what do you say? Will you be mine?"

Lily pretended to swoon and said "Oh yes darling, but let's raise cats instead of chickens. They can sleep in your kitten hair."

"So it's settled then, but before we run away you need a working leg."


	5. Chapter 4

Several hours later Gideon held on to Lily as they rode the train to Amity. He had told her they could take the bus, but she had insisted she wanted to jump on the train again, and even though she was Amity, Gideon had learned long ago there was no arguing with her.

"You don't have to hold onto me you know." Lily said, "Not that I mind of course."

Gideon loosened his grip a little, but he didn't want to let go. He knew Lily could stand in the train just fine, but he just needed to be close to her. Gideon had been thinking more and more about the choosing ceremony, and he knew that today was probably his last day with Lily. They had said before that nothing would change, but he knew that wasn't true. She would go on to her life in Amity and he would go on in Dauntless and they would promise to visit all the time in the city, but they wouldn't; and one day they would get jobs and families and slowly regress from each other's lives until they finally went from friends to memories. He needed to hold on to her, while she was still there to hold.

Gideon was snapped from his thoughts by Lily pulling away from him as she walked to the open train door, grabbed the handlebar, and swung herself half out the train. Over the roar of the wind he could hear her shout, "Gideon, come look at the sunset! It's so pretty!"

Gideon rushed forward, pulling her back inside.

"Dammit Lilly, are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"Not particularly. I thought you would like it, it's the brave thing to do right?" Lily flashed him a coy smile. "I wanted to see the sunset. This is one of the best views, because you don't have the fence or buildings getting in the way. Besides, it feels so nice to have the wind in my hair, and I may never experience this again."

"Winnie likes standing by the door too. But then she always complains about her hairs getting tangled."

"I don't mind it, but you can tell your sister that if she doesn't want tangles, she could try braiding it. You don't get the same wooshy effect, but it's still nice."

"Thanks," Gideon said, wrapping his arms back around Lily as she started eyeing the open door again, "I'll let her know."

"Do you think they like me?" Lily asked.

"Who?"

"Your family. I can never tell."

"Well, they say they do, and I don't know why they wouldn't."

"But do you know why they like me, or don't like me." Lily seemed wrapped up in her own mind. Like she wasn't really in the moment. Gideon had seen her like this before. When Lily met new people she always went over every bit of the encounter in her mind. She said it was to try and remember what, if anything, she did had made them unhappy, so she could fix it next time; but Gideon thought she was just afraid that they hadn't really liked her. She had met his family plenty of times before, but she still did this every time.

"Well," he said, hoping to ease her mind, "Winnie adores you, she says you're too pretty to hang out with me. Mom likes that you always help her when you stay for dinner. Tessa likes your sense of humor, although she says sometimes you remind her of a Candor."

"What, why?!" Lily looked panicked

"Because you say the first thing that comes to your mind a lot. I don't know that it's a bad thing though, since Tessa does that a lot too." Gideon debated for a second whether or not to mention his father, "And Dad is...Dad. You know, he's quiet about his opinions, but I think he likes you okay."

"That's good, you know how much I worry with them. I'm just always afraid of saying something so Amity that they just hate me."

"Who could ever hate you?" Gideon asked, hugging her closer, "You're the most amazing person I know."

Lily blushed a little, "Thank you, I think you're pretty great too." Lily turned around in his arms and hugged him.

"Promise me that nothing will change after tomorrow. That we will still be best friends, no matter what we choose?" she asked softly.

Gideon lifted her chin to look in her beautiful dark blue eyes. They were brimming with tears, and she honestly looked scared.

"I promise," he whispered, "I will always be here for you."

For a moment they held each other's gaze and Gideon tried to memorize Lily's face. Her shimmering eyes and her pink lips, her pale face and her blonde hair glowing in the orange light of the sunset.

Then Lily pulled away, rushing back to the doors and looking out.

"Gideon, it's time to jump. I can see the station."

Gideon walked over to her and took her hand. He expected her to pull away, but instead she just smiled and said, "Together?"

Gideon nodded, and as Lily turned away he whispered under his breath, "Always."

**A/N Oh goodness, what have I done with this chapter? I don't even, I didn't know I could be this sappy. But it happened soooo, hope you all liked it. And I hope you liked getting a peak in to Gideon's mind for a while. ****Points to whoever spotted the Harry Potter reference.**


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N I honestly cannot believe the streak I'm on right now. All of you who have flowed and reviewed and favorited, you are all so great and you make my little heart smile. This next chapter is pretty long so get your popcorn ready. I hope you all like it (and the only way I know you like it is by clicking one of those lovely Follow/Fave/Review buttons at the bottom of the story)**

**Sidebar: The term warhorse in the context I've used it is a slang term I made up. It means a non-dauntless person who dates/sleeps with a lot of dauntless. Kind of a dauntless groupie.**

Gideon sat anxiously in the back of the amphitheater. He had tried to draw as little attention to himself as he could, but Amities kept turning around to stare at him. There were plenty of non-Amities at the show, but he was the only Dauntless in the audience. Sitting alone with everyone looking at him freaked him out a little, he felt like he was on display. Of course, he could go sit with Lily's parents, but her Candor cousins and Aunt were there too, and the only thing worse than a bunch of Amities staring at you, were Candors insulting you to your face.

Gideon had been surprised by the large audience, he didn't think an Amity a cappella group would draw such a crowd. But, there wasn't much public entertainment in the city, so the Amity music shows and Dauntless fights were usually the only options if you didn't feel like making your own fun. Gideon had heard Lily sing before, and seen her group practice at school, but this was his first time at a full concert.

The amphitheater had once been a warehouse, Johanna had petitioned a few years ago to remodel it; _"for morale" _she had said. Now it had a few hundred seats, a small stage and a couple of spotlights that had fallen off the fence and been salvaged and repaired. It looked a little run down, but then, so did everything else in the city.

The lights in the house turned off and a few moments later the spotlights illuminated the stage. The Amity singers were in rows on risers, Lily was in the front, near the middle. She had put her hair in a French braid and Gideon could see flowers stuck in it. She had also changed into the same red dress as the other girls in the choir, although Gideon thought it looked best on her.

The crowd hushed as a redheaded girl in the front row blew a pitch pipe and the choir began to sing. The first few songs didn't have any words, just the group making their voices sound like instruments. It was actually pretty cool. Next was a set of original songs that the Amity took turns singing, all about love and peace and fruit (or something like that, they all sounded the same). Then Lily stepped forward, Gideon remembered her saying that her solo was the last in the show and he leaned forward a little in his seat. Lily took the single microphone and softly sang in a deep voice,

_I'm bullet proof_

_Nothing to lose_

_Fire away, fire away_

The other singers looked confused and started whispering to one another. One by one they started to harmonize in the background, but it was clear none of them knew the song Lily was singing.

_Ricochet, you take your aim_

_Fire away, fire away_

_Shoot me down_

_But I won't fall_

_I am titanium_

Both the performers and the audience became more uncomfortable as Lily continued to sing, but Gideon wasn't paying attention. He thought Lily's voice was beautiful, and sure it was odd to hear an Amity sing about bullets and shooting things, but she just sounded so powerful. She was so into the song, it was like she was in a completely different world; Gideon was entranced by all of it, her voice and her face. It was like he was under a spell.

When the song ended Gideon stood and clapped as loud as he could and cheered at the top of his lungs, before realizing that he was the only one doing so. Lily's parents were clapping, her cousins were not. The rest of the audience hesitated and slowly began to clap politely as everyone took a bow and left the stage. Several people had taken a moment to stare at him before doing so, at which point Gideon considered sinking awkwardly into his chair before deciding to, instead, cheer louder.

The audience began to slowly trickle out and Gideon followed Lily's parents to the backstage exit.

"Gideon." Lily's mother said upon seeing him, "I thought that was you I heard cheering. It's lovely to see you again." She hugged him tightly and Lily's father patted him on the back, a gesture which was still as awkward as the first time had happened. Gideon and Lily's father still weren't quite used to each other.

Singers had started emerging from backstage and Lily came flying out the door with a huge smile on her face.

"Oh my gosh, you all came!" she exclaimed, "Did you like the show? What about my song? Did you like it, I don't think a lot of people liked it. Ariel was upset because I changed it and forgot to tell her but I think it sounded great so I don't get what the problem is. So did you love it?"

"Whoa, slow down, sweetheart" her father said, putting a hand on her shoulder to calm her down, "you sounded great, the show was wonderful."

"That's his way of avoiding telling you he didn't like the song." Sarah chimed in, and Gideon was reminded that she and David, her older brother, were still there.

"Yeah," David said, "I mean, we all know you're a total warhorse, that doesn't mean you need to sing a song about it."

"David!" Lily's aunt shouted, "That was rude and unnecessary. I don't care if you are 18, I can still punish you!"

Shockingly that actually shut David up, not an easy feat. Candor or not, Gideon had always respected Lily's aunt.

"There's no need for yelling," Lily's mom said calmly, "how about we all go around the theatre to the refreshment table. They have cookies."

After a chorus of "yes please" and "no thanks" the adults and Sarah went to get snacks, leaving Gideon, Lily, and David together.

"You know," Lily said to David, "that wasn't what my song was about. If you'd paid more attention to the lyrics you would know that, or was my diction bad?"

"Your diction was great," Gideon assured her, although he wasn't sure what diction was exactly, "and so was your song. You have a lovely voice, it was amazing."

"Well, of course he's going to say that," David snarked, "you were obviously singing to him after all."

"That song was for everyone." Lily said, pouting a little, "I'm sorry you didn't like it."

"It's just so obvious what you were trying to do. I wish you'd just admit it."

"Lay off her, David." Gideon sneered, stepping between them.

"And what are you going to do about it, brute? I'm just being honest with her, she did ask what we thought."

"And now I'm asking you to please shut the hell up."

"Or what? You'll hit me and get yourself thrown out of Amity? Yeah, that will impress her." David asked, smirking, "I was being sarcastic by the way."

Lily grabbed Gideon's arm, gently saying to David, "I appreciate your honesty David, but I think that Gideon and I should go now."

"Go ahead," David said, "but just know this. I know what you're thinking Lily, and you need to stop, or you'll wind up Factionless." David brushed himself off before going over to his sister.

"He shouldn't talk to you like that." Gideon scowled.

"He can't help it, it's just in his nature." Lily said soothingly, "I'm sure he's really just worried about me. But don't think about any of that now, I have something I want to show you."

Lily took his hand and led him away from the theatre, out to the farm neighboring it. She pointed out towards a small farmhouse on the other side of the field and said, "You know, there really is a chicken farm here. It's a cute house don't you think?"

"It is, it's actually...adorable." And it was. Gideon didn't use the word adorable often, but it really was the only word for that house. It was small and pink and it had a little white porch with two rocking chairs and a swing. It was like a doll house.

Lily looked at Gideon, "Wouldn't it be fun to live in a cute little house like that?"

"Yeah, but 10 kids would be a tight squeeze" he joked.

"Good point, some of them would have to sleep with the chickens."

Lily laid her head on Gideon's shoulder, entwining her fingers in his, "We're not gonna have that are we?" she said softly.

"Ten kids?" he asked, "I don't know, seems like a lot"

"I mean any of it. I've been waiting for years, thinking that I had time for all of this and now it's going to be too late."

"Too late for what?"

"For us," she said, "for me to tell you...everything! How much I like you, how important you are to me, how fantastic it's been having you in my life, how I am who I am just because of you, how I think you're perfect and always thought we'd be a great couple but girls are always swarming you so I never told you because why would you be with me when you could be with a Dauntless girl, especially one who is prettier than me. Or how I always hoped you would tell me one day that you liked me so I wouldn't have to tell you first and then we'd fall in love and…" Gideon pressed a finger to Lily's lips to quiet her. She pushed his hand away and said softly, as a tear fell down her cheek, "But now it's too late for all of that."

"No, it's not. It'll never be too late." Gideon said, "We both still have a lot we want to say, and tonight is not the last chance we'll get to say it. So let's just enjoy tonight, okay? There will be time for all the rest another day."

Lily looked up at him, tears flowing down her cheeks, glowing in the moonlight. She grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him down, standing on her tip toes to kiss him softly on the lips. Gideon wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into him and forgetting everything but that moment for a while.

On the train home that night he went over it all again in his mind; the house, the concert, Lily. He thought about everything she had said, about wanting to fall in love and have a life together and Gideon realized, that was her goodbye. She was right, with him in Dauntless and her in Amity, they could be friends but they could never have a home or a family or a life together. And she was going to choose Amity, so if he wanted to be with her...he knew what he had to do.

**A/N Whoa, that all just happened. Hope you all love it and remember to follow/fave/review!**

**Disclaimer: The song Lily sung was not her own. It is Titanium by David Guetta. Please don't sue me.**


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N It's choosing day! POV may get a little funky with this one, I hope it's ok.**

Gideon barely slept that night, every time his eyes drifted closed he spun into a dark nightmare. He stood in front of the city's population, all of them chanting "Choose! Choose!" and when his blood fell he couldn't see where it landed and everyone jeered and shouted "You chose wrong!" Lily's face stood out among the crowd, "Gideon!" she would shout, tears streaming down her cheeks, "How could you? How could you leave me like that?!", and he would wake up to find that it had only been 10 minutes since he'd last looked at the clock.

When his mother finally came into his room that morning he had already given up on sleep and was showered, dressed, and sitting on his bed writing a letter.

"You're up already?" his mother asked, "After all these years of me having to drag you out of bed you choose today to get up on time. Maybe you really are an adult now."

She was already starting to tear up. Gideon closed his notebook and stood up to hug her.

"Aw, Mom, c'mon on, it's not a big deal. I mean it's not like you're never gonna see me again or anything."

"I know, I know it's just... I am so proud of you. You've grown in to such a perfect young man." She pulled away and collected herself, "Well, since you're awake you can wake up your sister, I'm going to go get ready and then we'll go to the pit for breakfast."

Gideon went into his sister's room and shook her shoulder gently, "Winnie, come on sweetie it's time to get up."

The six year old just mumble something and pulled her pillow over her head.

"Come on Win, it's my choosing day. If you don't get up I'll think you don't love me. And then I'll have to go be a Candor or something."

"No!" Winnie sprung straight up and threw her arms around Gideon. He laughed and attempted to get some of her messy brown hair out of his mouth.

"Come on Win, you know I'm joking."

"You are?" She looked up at him with her huge blue eyes.

"Of course, I mean Candor, really? I'd rather be Factionless." He picked Winnie up and carried her into the bathroom, "Now brush your teeth and I'll braid your hair like Lily taught me."

Half an hour later, in the pit, Gideon looked around at all the other kids who would be choosing today. He wondered who would transfer, who would stay, and if any wouldn't make it through initiation. He wondered what the other faction's initiations were like. He knew Erudite took intelligence tests, since that was how they elected a leader, and Candor used the same truth serum that was used on criminals during trials. He had no idea what Amity initiation was like, or if they even had a process.

These questions filled his head throughout all of breakfast and the train ride across town. He is kissed his mother on the cheek, hugged his sisters and went to stand in line with the other choosers. His father was a Leader, so he had left home early that morning to prepare for the ceremony.

Shortly after getting in line, Gideon saw Lily and the other Amities enter the hall and he was reminded of the night before. They hadn't been able to spend much time together after their kiss, her parents had come looking for her to take her home. He suddenly realized he had no idea how to behave around her now. What should he say, or do? How do you treat the woman you're about to change your whole life for?

"Hi" Lily whispered, getting in line next to him. The two of them would be the last to choose today, first Gideon, then Lily.

"Hey"

"Are you nervous?"

"No, why would I be. We just trust the test right?"

"Sure," she gripped his arm and Gideon couldn't tell if it was for her own comfort or his, "don't be nervous. Everything will work out fine." She kissed his cheek softly just before the Amity representative, Johanna Reyes, stepped forward to begin the ceremony. Gideon could see his father and all the other faction leaders and representatives sitting around the stage. Johanna gave the same speech the ceremony officiators always did, at least Gideon assumed she did, he wasn't listening. It felt like years, watching each person before him make their choice. He watched as Xavier and Jackson both chose Dauntless, and Lily's cousin Sarah went to Candor. He held his breath as a Dauntless girl, Julianna, stood over the bowl for a full two minutes before transferring to Erudite; and he couldn't help but smile each time the Dauntless cheered for their new transfers. Even with as long as it took, when his turn came it suddenly seemed he had blinked and missed everyone else.

"Gideon Aserath!" Johanna called.

Gideon took a deep breath and reached out to squeeze Lily's hand before walking onstage. He stood behind the semicircle of bowls, looking out at the audience. He picked up the knife and cut his hand, looking up at his family as he held his hand out. He tried to let them know silently, somehow, that he was sorry as his hand reached out over the bowls. Then he looked at Lily, he had to, to remind him why he was doing this. His hand began to drift over to the Amity bowl and Lily's eyes widened, she shook her head slightly.

"It's ok" he mouthed as he began to tilt his hand.

-4 hours earlier: Amity-

Lily sat on the roof of her house, watching the sun rise over the fields. The farmlands and meadows expanded for what seemed like forever, and Lily had always loved them, especially in the mornings, when they glowed orange and red in the new sunlight. But today was different, Lily had been up all night thinking about the Choosing and was still no closer to a decision. When Lily thought about it, she really believed she could be happy in any faction. She loved learning, so Erudite could be fun, and Candor had never annoyed her as much as others. She liked the Abnegation's passion for helping others, and ever since she was little she had relished in the bravery of the Dauntless. But Amity had always given her so much freedom, as long as she never hurt anyone she could do whatever she wanted. It was a peaceful life and she loved it; but what she really wanted was Gideon. And could Gideon really be happy living in Amity? There were only a dozen Dauntless transfers in Amity as it was, and initiators always judged them the most harshly. One wrong step and Gideon would be Factionless. She remembered how quickly he had snapped when David insulted her, something that aggressive would get him kicked out for sure. No, it wouldn't be right to ask him to transfer for her, not when she could be perfectly happy in Dauntless. She'd always wondered what it would be like to be one of them, to be the first Amity to transfer to Dauntless and stay there, to prove that Amities could be brave. To prove that she could be brave, that she didn't have to be what anyone, be it Gideon, or her family, or some test, told her she was supposed to be. Now all that was left, was to find it in her heart to say goodbye to Amity.

Lily spent the rest of the morning preparing for her new life. She wore her favorite yoga outfit, an orange tank top and red sweats; then she took the locket her mother had given her on her birthday and hid it in the front of her shirt. The locket was silver with the Amity faction symbol on it, when her mother gave it to her she had told her it was so she could always remember her roots, no matter where life took her. It was as if her mother had known, even then, that Lily would leave Amity one day.

As she wandered around her house, Lily found herself touching things a lot, as if trying to absorb their memory through her fingertips. It almost felt like she was dying, like she was never coming back. But she needed to stop thinking about things that way, this wasn't the end of the world. Her parents would still love her no matter what she chose, she could always come back to this house to visit. And she was going to be with Gideon, that's what she wanted, right? And she wasn't just transferring for him, she knew that, there was something else drawing her towards Dauntless, the same thing that had propelled her to climb that statue six years ago. She just didn't know what it was yet. Maybe it was a need to prove herself, or a desire to be some kind of hero, or maybe she just had a death wish. She figured the answer would come in time.

"Time to go!" her mother's voice chimed as she poked her head through Lily's door, "Come one darling, you don't want to be late for such an important day."

Looking at her mother's smiling face Lily felt tears welling up in her eyes and she launched herself into her mother's arms.

"Oh sweetie," her mother cooed, "don't you start now. If you cry then I'll cry, and then your father will come in here and he'll cry and you'll never make it out the front door."

"I'm sorry Mom," Lily said, "I'm just nervous. What if I choose wrong?"

Her mother cupped her face in her hands and said, "There, there darling, I know that it's hard growing up, but let me tell you something very important. In your life there are going to be people who will speak out against you for your choices, but you must find it in your heart to forgive them. Because even if you think differently from other people, that doesn't make either of you right or wrong, or better than the other. It's important that you always stay strong and be brave, but never ever stop being kind, that way they can never win. And most importantly darling, always stand by your choices, no matter how hard that may be."

Lily didn't know what to say. Her mother hugged her again and then led her out of the house to where her father was waiting. Because her father ran a farm he had his own car, so Lily and her family were driving some other groups in the area into town.

"Ready to go kiddo?" Her father asked as her ruffled her hair.

"As ready as I'll ever be." Her father helped her into the truck and kissed her forehead before going around the car to drive.

When they arrived at the Choosing Ceremony about an hour later Lily scanned the room for Gideon. Upon seeing him she felt a mixture of pure bliss and absolute terror. What if he didn't what her to transfer? What if he thought she was weak? What if after last night he realized he didn't like her the way she liked him and now he didn't want to see her anymore? What if he wasn't even staying in Dauntless? What if he had decided to transfer to Candor and become a judge and marry David? Ok, now she was just losing her mind. Even if Gideon were going to transfer and marry a man, it would be to like, some Erudite or something, not Candor.

Lily hugged her parents good bye, pushing away the thought that it could be the last time, and walked over to Gideon, trying to smile.

"Hi" she smiled

"Hey" Gideon sounded tense.

"Are you nervous?"

"No, why would I be? We just trust the test, right?" Gideon sounded so certain of that. She was sure he had gotten Dauntless, he knew exactly where he belonged.

"Sure" she said lightly, _"no" _she thought. She was doing the exact opposite of what the test told her to do. It was like flipping a coin to make a decision, if you liked the outcome then the coin was magic; and if you didn't, then it was just a stupid coin. She grabbed onto Gideon's arm, using him to ground herself in the moment.

From that point on time passed in a blur, Johanna's speech, the names, the choices, she couldn't remember anything even a second after it happened. Before she knew it Gideon's name was being called and she was left standing alone.

She watched him walk up the stairs and cut his hand, then he looked right in her eyes as his hand began to inch towards Amity. Wait, Amity? What the hell was he doing hovering over Amity? She shook her head at him but he just mouthed "it's okay." It was not "okay" not at all. He was just standing there with that look on his face that he always got right before doing something that he though was clever but was really very stupid. And this was very _very _stupid! Gideon didn't belong in Amity, and neither did she. Lily glared at him and softly whispered, making sure he would be able to read her lips perfectly, "Don't. You. Dare."

Gideon watched Lily, reading her lips carefully. He knew that face, he had seen it several times before. Usually if he didn't do what Lily told him to when she used that face, he wound up doing something that landed him in either detention or the hospital. She was serious, she didn't want him to do this.

He felt his heart break a little, did this mean she didn't want to be with him? He looked down as the blood on his hand gathered, it was almost overflowing. At the last second he snapped out of it and shifted his hand, letting the blood fall over Dauntless coals.

Lily let out a sigh of relief as Gideon stepped towards the cheering Dauntless.

"Lillian Abercrombie!" Johanna called out. As Lily stepped forward Johanna smiled kindly at her, Lily had always been fond of Johanna. When Johanna had been elected Lily had painted her a picture to congratulate her. She probably wouldn't keep the painting after this.

Lily's mind was empty, she couldn't see or hear anything. There was only the knife and the sizzling coals. She knew her choice, it was easy, now she just had to make it. She picked up the knife, holding her hand out over the bowl and slicing deep, hearing only the sound of her blood, sizzling on the coals. Seeing only the fire burning in the embers.

**A/N I'm actually wildly excited right now, I hope you all are too. If you want to show me just how excited you are (or how I could make the story more exciting to you) you can press that lovely little review button or just Fav/follow.**

**Remember, inside those buttons are magical fairies that fly into my brain and make me write, the more you click the faster they fly!**


	8. Chapter 7

**Hey Everybody, I'm sorry about the long wait for this chapter. I went on faction over easter and muse decided to just stay on vacation I guess. But now she is back, with this new chapter! Thank you all for the lovely reviews and fabs and follows, I feel so loved 3. Also a few people have asked me what Lily and gideon look like so the new cover photo for this story is how I imagine Lily and my author avatar, if you go to my profile, is kind of what Gideon looks like (except with blue tips in his hair because I couldn't find a good picture of a guy with blue hair).**

**Ok, I'll stop rambling, enjoy!**

Lily's blood fizzled out on the coals with a hiss, and there was silence. There were no cheers, there was no applause. Lily stood as the entire city stared at her, not making a sound. She found her parents in the crowd, her mother had tears in her eyes, but they looked proud nonetheless. She pulled her gaze from them and looked to Gideon, he looked like he had been slapped in the face. She realized Johanna had not yet called out her chosen faction and she turned to look at her. The Amity woman was staring at her, terrified. Johanna whispered shakily, "Dauntless".

The tension could be cut with a knife, and then Lily heard a voice shout "Dauntless!"

She saw Xavier stand up and clap and cheer, followed by Jackson, and then by more Dauntless. The cheers swelled into a battle cry, and the Dauntless rushed towards her, Xavier grabbed her hand and pulled her out to the stairwell. She couldn't see Gideon anywhere, he hadn't stood or cheered when everyone else did.

Lily swung her head around, searching for him, but the Dauntless around her were too fast and too many. The swarm of black engulfed her and she had to put all her focus on the stairs under her feet and keeping up with the pace of the crowd. The Dauntless burst through the doors and began to sprint down the street. Inside, their cheers had echoed, blocking out any other sound or thought; out here, they were a chorus, lifting her up and making her feet fly and her heart soar. She tilted her head back, feeling the wind on her face and in her hair, as she whooped and cheered along with them.

When they arrived at the train tracks the Dauntless started climbing the support beams, she saw a flash of blue hair near the top and rushed towards it, only to realize the hair belong to a Dauntless girl, not Gideon.

"Your boyfriend can wait!" She heard a voice behind her say, and a Candor boy grabbed her arm and pulled her towards the beams, "He already made it to the top, now come on."

She followed the boy up the beams, relishing in the strength and pull in her arms. Ever since climbing that statue in fifth grade, climbing had been her favorite exercise. When she reached the top the Candor boy was waiting for her.

"I'm Luther" he said.

"Lily," Lily smiled at him and then looked out over the street. The Dauntless formed a rainbow of colors in the street with their hair, it was absolutely beautiful. She could see Xavier and Jackson climbing the support beam a short ways away, pushing and shoving at each other playfully as they raced to the top. Just below them she saw Gideon jump to a bar and pull himself up.

"You said Gideon already made it to the top," she looked at the Candor boy incredulously.

"I lied," He grinned, and then turned and began to jog away. At first Lily thought he was running from her, until a gust of wind hit her and the train begin to roll past. She broke into a run as she chased the train, pulling herself on with ease. When she turned around she saw Luther at the door, trying to keep up and tripping over his own feet.

"Don't help him," she looked towards the voice and saw a tiny Erudite girl standing next to her, "it won't look good for either of you. He needs to prove he can do this, and you need to stop acting like an Amity."

Lily stared at the girl for a second before just smiling a little and swinging out the train door grab Luther's hand. She pulled him into the train and then looked back at the Erudite girl, "There's no reason I can't still be nice, changing factions doesn't mean I need to become a bad person."

The Erudite girl chuckled, "Well, aren't you just a ray of sunshine. I'm Maya."

Maya was petite, almost a foot shorter than Lily, and she had short dark hair that fell over one of her almond eyes.

"I'm Lily, and this is Luther. Luther's a Candor, except apparently he lies a lot." She looked back at Luther, who was about her height and had icy blue eyes and chocolate hair.

"Not a lot," he said defensively, "but you weren't going to climb if you didn't think Gideon was safe. So you're welcome." He crossed his arms and cocked his hip. He reminded her of Sarah.

"Oh no!" She gasped, "Gideon, he was still climbing when the train came, what if her didn't make it?"

Lily pushed past them and started making her way through the train. She was in the last car and it was mostly empty, so she crossed over to the next one. With each car she passed through she grew increasingly nervous, until she reached the front and saw him standing with Xavier and Jackson. She ran towards him and he turned towards her just seconds before she leapt into his arms. He held her tight, lifting her off the ground and kissed her.

"There you are! I was afraid you didn't make it, are you okay?" he began lifting her arms and hair, looking all over her for injuries.

"I'm fine," She laughed, "better now that I found you. I saw you climbing when the train came and thought you might not have made it up in time. Are _you _okay?" She playfully mimicked him, lifting his arms and spinning him around.

"Oh he's fine," Xavier said

"Aside from the brain damage," Jackson added, "That is what it was right? The reason you thought you could be an Amity." he grabbed Gideon shoulders and knocked on his head.

"Oh man," Xavier laughed, "I nearly had a heart attack when I saw it. You standing with your hand over that bowl-"

"With that dopey look on his face." Lily finished off, "Me too. What on Earth were you thinking?"

"What was I thinking?" Gideon exclaimed, "I was thinking that, last night, you told me that's what you wanted!"

"I never said anything like that."

"Then what was all that talk about time running out, and our lives together ending and-and-chicken farms!" Gideon looked baffled, "A better question is, what were you thinking, transferring to Dauntless."

"I wanted to transfer to Dauntless, is that so hard to believe?"

"Then why couldn't you tell me?" by now, neither was playing anymore, and Lily realized for the first time, Gideon wasn't angry at her. He was hurt.

She stepped forward and hugged him, resting her head on his shoulder, "I'm sorry" she whispered, "I'm so sorry. I didn't know what I was going to choose, and I didn't want to make a promise I couldn't keep."

Gideon held on to her, keeping her close, "You really freaked me out back there."

"Are you mad at me?"

"Never."

People were lining up at the train doors and Gideon and Lily made their way over, peering out the window.

"This isn't the station." Lily said, confused.

"No, this is for initiation only, that building up there," Gideon pointed, "leads to the back entrance to Dauntless. I've never been up there before, but I've heard of it."

"We have to jump all the way over there."

"It would seem so." He looked down at her and asked, "Are you still sure about this."

"Absolutely."

Gideon grabbed her hand as they neared the building, "Then I'm with you, every step of the way."

They stepped back from the door, preparing for a running start.

"On three?" Gideon asked.

Lily nodded, squeezing his hand tighter.

"One. Two. Three!" the two of them rushed forward, leaping out of the train and over the gap.

And they hovered, weightless, in the air.


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N: This chapter is a little short but you get to see a few new sides of Lily. Hope you all like it. 3**

Lily felt all gravity disappear for just a moment, and then she was plummeting towards the ground. She slammed into the roof and felt her legs buckle underneath her. Gideon wrapped his arms around her, keeping her up. Next to her Xavier was helping Jackson off the ground, Jackson shirt was torn and he had a scrape on his forearm, like he had landed on it. All around her people were getting up and brushing themselves off, then she heard someone scream.

She turned and saw an Erudite boy on the ground, his ankle was twisted around backwards and bleeding heavily. She had broken her own ankle like that once, when she was seven and feel out of a tree, she tried to remember what the doctor had done then. She rushed over to the boy, and knelt beside him, "You're going to be ok," she whispered softly, "you're gonna be fine." She gently pulled up his pants leg, looking at the wound. It was like the rest of her mind had turned off, all she was thinking of were facts. It wasn't a clean break, the bone was splintered, and it was broken above the joint. She couldn't reset the bone, but she did need to stop the bleeding. She took off her jacket and tied it around his leg tight, just before she was pulled to her feet.

A man was standing less than six inches from her face, and he was yelling at her. She snapped back to reality as he shouted, "...do you have any idea how much worse you could have hurt him! You stupid girl, you could have caused all kinds of problems if you had kept up what you were doing! What the hell were you thinking?"

"I was thinking," she said loudly to cut him off, then proceeded calmly, "that he had a bad break in his leg and the bone was splintered, therefore making it difficult to reset. I was also thinking that a break like that would cause perfuse bleeding and I needed to stop that bleeding. I was also thinking that there is all kinds of dirt and gravel in that wound and that stopping the bleeding would lower risk of infection which you must admit is very high. And most importantly, I was thinking that he was hurt and I didn't see any doctors around, and no one was helping him. I knew how to help him at least to a point and so I did. And, with all due respect, Sir, I am not stupid, I knew exactly what I was doing."

The man just shook his head and muttered, "An Amity with a mouth on her, who knew?" before pushing past her to assist the other doctors who had been working on the boy.

Lily made her way back over to Gideon, Xavier, and Jackson; who were all looking at her in amazement.

"Where did you learn to do all that?" Jackson asked.

"When I was 14, I wanted to be a doctor so I read a few of medical books."

"Well it was awesome!" Xavier was grinning like a maniac, "you were like some kind of super hero, the rest of us were just standing there like 'whaaaat' and you were all like-"

Gideon held out a hand to quiet him as a tall man with buzzed blonde hair and piercings began to speak.

"Well, that was exciting wasn't it? You can expect to see a lot more of that during your time here, that and worse. My name is Eric, and I will be watching over your initiation. But before we can get started, you have to get in, and there's only one way to do that. The entrance to the Dauntless compound is down there," he pointed over the edge on the building, where he was standing, "jump and you're an official initiate, don't, and you're Factionless. Who wants to go first?"

"Is this some kind of a test?" Maya asked from the front of the crowd, "to see who's so stupid they'd actually jump just because you say so."

"It is a test," Eric said, "to see who wants to be here badly enough. One thing you will learn here is to trust your commander. It is not my job to kill you off."

"You wouldn't know it by looking at him." Lily jumped and turned to see Luther smiling at her.

"Do you always sneak up on people like that?" She whispered.

"No, but I think I may start, it's fun."

"I'm gonna ask one more time," Eric said, "any volunteers?"

"Let me go!" The blue haired Dauntless girl Lily had earlier mistaken for Gideon stepped forward. She was a bit shorter than Lily, but she looked really strong. She had a tattoo of a paw print on her arm and her hair, Lily could now see, was teal and shaggy, falling into her face.

She stepped onto the ledge and leapt, letting out a loud "Whooooo!" that grew softer as she fell.

Eric watched as she fell and then turned back to them, looking completely unimpressed.

"Next?"

A few Dauntless born raised their hands and shouted; Eric scanned the crowd before his eyes landed on Gideon, "You. You're the one who hovered over Amity at the ceremony, aren't you?"

Gideon looked down at the ground, ashamed, and said, "Yes, sir."

"Well, then I'd say you have a lot to prove don't you? You're up flower boy."

Gideon straightened his back, his eyes were dark and determined in a way Lily had never seen until now. He walked forward, a stride in his step, he really did have something to prove. Lily couldn't help thinking it was her fault his loyalty was being questioned.

As he stepped on the ledge and looked over, Eric whispered to him, "What are you waiting for, do you need your girlfriend to order you to jump?"

Gideon turned towards him, looking him sternly in the eye, and snarled "I don't take orders from anyone," and disappeared over the edge.

Gideon was barely out of sight before Lily called out, "Me next!"

Eric saw who had shouted and scoffed, "Alright then." He gestured to the ledge and she stepped up. Below her she saw a light flash twice and Eric said in a smooth voice, "Jump if you want, just remember, it doesn't make you Dauntless."

Lily just smiled kindly and him and chirped, "We'll see" before leaping into the abyss below.

She hit something springy, a net, a bounced up in the air a few times before someone pulled the net down and she rolled off. A muscular man boy about a year older than her helped her down and asked, "Name?"

"I'm Lily, what's your name"

**A/N: I promised my friend Sierra a shout out in this chapter. The first jumper is based on her. If any of you are in the Teen Wolf or Troop fandom her pen name in GayWolfie 66**


	10. Chapter 9

"I'm Lily, what's your name?" Lily smiled at the boy who helped her out of the net. He did not smile back, instead he just turned to the crowd of people and called out, "Third jumper, Lily!"

The crowd clapped and cheered as Lily found Gideon in the crowd and went to join him.

"He's not very friendly." She frowned looking at the boy manning the net.

"No, he's not," Gideon laughed, "That's Four, he's transferred over last year. Top of his initiation group, he was Abnegation, so I don't think he ever learned how to have fun."

Lily giggled.

As more jumpers came down Lily began to get restless. The dim concrete room was very different from what she was used to in the Amity field or glass schools. She was starting to find it hard to breath and she shrunk into Gideon nervously.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"Yes, it's just a little cramped down here. It wasn't like this when I was here before."

"Don't worry, when we get upstairs you'll feel better, and I think we're near the end."

A blur of white and black fell into the net and four called out, "Last jumper, Luther!"

Everyone clapped and cheered, and then people began to leave.

"Alright, transfers you're going to come with me," Four said, "Dauntless-born can go with Lauren."

"I'll see you later." Gideon whispered and kissed Lily's head before heading over to the Dauntless-born group.

Lily moved over to the transfer side of the room, standing next to Luther.

"Wow, that jump is really a rush, huh?" Luther was bouncing on his toes, either with excitement or nerves. Maybe both.

"Why did you go last?"

"I thought it might be like that Erudite girl, Maya, had said. You know, like a test of who was really dumb enough to jump. Jokes on me I guess."

"Did you think they would just kill us all off and leave you the last one standing?"

"No I just thought-"

"Stop talking," Four's voice wasn't loud, but it was stern and harsh, "my name is Four and I will be your initiation leader. Your initiation will consist of three stages. The first will be physically training your body. You will learn to fight, use weapons, and believe me when I say we will push you to the breaking point. The second part of your training will teach you to be calm in stressful situations and to strategize in a moment of danger. Stage three, we will test how well you have learned the lessons from stage one and two and if you fail the test you will not be accepted into Dauntless. Any questions?"

"Do we get to fight the Dauntless-born?" The question came from a muscular Erudite girl with blonde hair.

"No, but you will fight each other, and you will be tested and graded alongside the Dauntless-born."

Lily felt a sense of dread wash over her. Until this point she had completely forgotten that she would have to fight people. She would have to hold weapons and hurt people. She couldn't even imagine it.

"When you fight," Four continued, "you will continue to do so until one of you can no longer continue or until one of you concedes. Also your participation and progress will be tracked through each stage and count towards your final result, so don't think you can get out of training by conceding every fight. Anyone else?"

After a pause he continued, "Everyone follow me, I'll show you to your room."

"Room?" Luther piped up, "As in singular."

"That's correct."

Several of the other initiates looked perturbed by this, but Lily didn't mind. In Amity they shared nearly everything.

"This is the pit," Four said to the group as he led them into the large, arena-like space that Lily had seen before, with Gideon. "The pit contains all the Dauntless Compounds shops and food sources, you will eat here and if you need or want anything, clothes, a tattoo, and so on, you will get it here, so long as it is after training. Training lasts from 8am to 6pm with a lunch break, outside of that time you can do what you want so long as you do not leave the compound. The exception being if you are chaperoned by a Dauntless adult, not an initiate."

Four stopped in front of a huge hole in the middle of the pit.

"This," he said, "is the Chasm. It is very deep, entirely made of stone, and there is a rushing current at the bottom, fall or jump in and you will die."

"Then why is it here?" Luther asked, "It sounds like a safety hazard."

"Only if you are stupid." Four stared at Luther, moving towards him, "If you are smart it can't hurt you." He turned back to address the group, "The chasm is to remind you of the line between bravery and stupidity, do _not_ be stupid, understood."

There was a murmur of agreement.

"First lesson of Dauntless we do not mumble, now answer me clearly. Do you understand?"

Everyone shouted their own confirmation, it was still a jumble of voices, but a loud one.

"Good enough." Four sighed.

He led them past the storefronts in the pit and out of the corner of Lily's eye she saw a flash of color. She turned to see a tattoo parlor display window; the artwork was beautiful. Lily was drawn to the storefront and wandered over to it, admiring the detailing in the sketches. In the corner of the case there was a floral design, roses intwining with such perfect form. It was better than any Amity artwork she had seen.

'Hey- hey Blondie, Amity!"

Lily was brought back to the moment by the sound of Four's voice. She turned to see the entire initiation group had halted and was staring at her.

"You can pick out a tattoo later, come on you're holding us up."

Lily blushed and rejoined the group. Even though Four was just a year older than her, she felt like a chastised child.

Four led them downstairs and opened a door.

"This is where you will be living for the next 8 weeks, after initiation, if you make it through, you will be given homes on the main floors."

The room was mostly bare, with a line of bunk beds on either side of the room.

"That door." Four pointed to the left of the room, "Leads to the toilettes. The other, to the showers. In the trunks at the foot of your beds you will find standard Dauntless training gear, you do not have to wear it but I would advise it. Dinner will be served in the Pit in an hour until then you can feel free to meander around, though I would advise that some of you," he turned his head slightly, looking right at Lily, "not get too comfortable. You won't be here long."

After Four left, Lily walked over to one on the bunks and opened the storage trunk at the foot.

"Hey Lily," Luther said, leaning on the bed, "wanna be bunk mates?"

"Sure," Lily smiled, she pulled out a set of clothes that looked her size and began to change.

"Wow," Luther raised his eyebrows as Lily stripped, "you sure aren't shy, are you?"

"No, I'm used to changing in front of people, before gymnastics and concerts and stuff."

"Well that boyfriend of yours sure is lucky." Luther gave Lily a once over, letting out a breath, and then examined the crowd of new initiates.

"So what do you think? My bet's on Veronica."

"What?" Lily was confused.

"Of who our biggest competition is!" He sounded exasperated, "I mean you would think it would be that Candor guy, Jason, 'cause he's big, but I got into a fight with him last year and he is actually so pathetic. Veronica, on the other hand, is from Erudite which means she's smart, so the strategy phase is probably going to be easy for her. Plus she's built like a tank, so fighting should be easy for her too."

Lily recognized Veronica as the blonde girl from earlier, the one who had hope to fight the Dauntless-born.

"I don't know," Lily said looking her over, "she looks cagey. Like maybe she's hiding something. It could just be an act. Shouldn't you be able to tell all this?"

"There is a reason I transferred," Luther said, "I was always better at lying than lie-detecting."

"If that's true then how do I know if I can trust you?" Lily asked coyly.

"You don't, but you're an Amity so you will anyway."

Lily frowned a little.

"I'm not an Amity," She said slowly, "I'm Dauntless now."

**A/N Sorry this chapter was a little on the slow side, but it'll pick up again soon I promise.**

**In the meantime, send me a review, tell me what you think! I really do care 3 Also i want to know what y'all think of Luther sooooo…*pushes review button towards you and hides*)**

**And, as always thank you to everyone who has followed/faved/reviewed. You guys really make my life.**


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N So since the last chapter wasn't very eventful I decided to get this one up quickly instead of making you all wait. Hope you like it!**

Lily scanned the pit for Gideon, but in the sea of Dauntless, it was nearly impossible.

"There he is," Luther pointed to a table in the middle of the pit. Gideon was there with Xavier, Jackson, and the first jumper, whose name Lily didn't know.

"Who's the cutie?" Luther asked, still looking at Gideon's table.

"The blue haired girl? I don't know, but I think she's leaving."

"No not her," Luther sighed as they made their way through the crowd, "The brown haired guy. The tan one?"

"Oh, that's Xavier. He's Gideon's best friend."

They made it to the table and Lily hugged Gideon from behind.

"Hi sweetie," she said, kissing his cheek, "This is my friend Luther. He helped me find you. Also he thinks Xavier is cute."

She sat next to Gideon as Luther stared at her in shock.

"Wow," Jackson laughed, "that was blunt. Are you sure you weren't supposed to be in Candor."

"Why would I want to do that?" Lily asked

Luther sat next to her, composing himself, "I believe he was commenting on the fact that you tend to blurt things out. I've known you less than a day and I've figured that out."

"I don't see what the problem is," Lily said, grabbing a bread roll, "if you think he's cute you should just get it out there."

"Says the girl who strung my best friend along for six years." Xavier smirked.

"And I learned my lesson. So am I the only one that totally forgot we would have to fight during initiation?"

"Yes." They all said at the same time.

"How's that gonna work?" Jackson asked, "I mean, you've like, never even been allowed to insult people. How are you gonna hit them?"

"Yeah," Gideon said, nervously, "I mean it's one thing to be able to run and climb on stuff, but fighting an actual person is different, and you're probably the only transfer who hasn't started practicing yet."

"I guess I'll just fake it, or take a lot of beatings..." Lily really hadn't thought about the idea that the others had been practicing for this, that they didn't make up their minds at the last second.

"Well, I mean the point of training separate from the Dauntless-born is that we haven't practiced as much as them right?" Luther's voice was shaky, "It makes it more fair that way..."

"But, you've fought before haven't you?" Xavier asked.

"Well, yeah, yeah a little."

"I'll figure it out." Lily said, determined, "I can do this, don't worry about me."

Gideon smiled softly and said, "I'm still gonna worry, but I know you can do it."

Jackson and Xavier shared a look and pretended to gag into their food.

"You know what you need," Xavier said, "to feel like a Dauntless."

"Yeah sure," Jackson joked, "'Feel the Dauntless, Be the Dauntless, Live the Dauntless'. What she needs, man, is to practice. Why don't you just start practicing on the punching bags and stuff after hours? They leave the training rooms unlocked."

"We'd offer to help but it's against the rules." Xavier added.

"I will, but I also think Xavier's right. I need to make a change. Something to feel like a part of this place."

"Oooooh, you could get a tattoo!" Luther exclaimed, "Or, like, dye your hair! You would look so cool with pitch black hair."

"Actually," Lily smiled, "in Amity we have a tradition of only cutting our hair after major life events. The last time I cut mine was when I got my first solo in choir. If there was ever a time for it, I think it would be now."

"Well what are we waiting for?" Jackson said, "Let's go people! We're all getting haircuts."

Jackson and Xavier hollered and jumped up and ran to the edge of the pit. Luther jogged after them, but Lily and Gideon took their time.

"You aren't really gonna dye your hair black are you?" Gideon asked.

"No, but it would be nice to do something fun. We aren't allowed to use hair dye in Amity."

"I could help you." He whispered.

"Dye my hair?" She raised her eyebrows, "I think I'd rather have a professional do that."

"No, I could help you train."

"But, I thought-"

"I know it's against the rules but, I just know that you can do this and I want to help."

Lily hesitated, "I'll think about it, okay?"

"Okay." Gideon kissed her gently, holding her close.

"Hey, guys come on, you can make out later, and the hair place is gonna close!"

They pulled apart at the sound of their friends' voices and ran to catch up with them.

When they got to the salon it was empty, besides the employees. Gideon's older sister, Tessa, was rearranging some dyes on a shelf.

"Hey Tessa, you guys aren't closed yet are you?" he asked.

"No, but it's pretty late for so many people, if you're all going."

"Come on sis, you can stay open a little late can't you." Gideon fluttered his eyelashes like a little kid.

"We can stay open a while longer." the receptionist said.

Tessa rolled her eyes, "Fine, everybody hop in a chair, we'll make this quick."

Jackson, Xavier, and Luther all jumped into their chairs, making them spin.

"I can do my own" Gideon said, walking over to the dye station.

Lily sat in a chair and Tessa stood behind her, making eye contact in the mirror.

"So, I just want to cut it a little, like shoulder length," Lily motioned the length with her hand, "And maybe do some color? I'd love a pink streak."

"We can do that." Tessa led her over to the sinks and washed her hair, then led her back and began cutting.

"That was a pretty bold move you made this morning." She said to Lily, "You've got Gideon wrapped around your little finger don't you?"

"Ummm, I don't know. I mean...I don't..." Lily was at a loss for words.

"Just know this," Tessa leaned down to whisper in Lily's ear, "I know what you are, and if you hurt my brother, I will tell everyone."

Tessa stood up and smiled, "Now, let's get that color on shall we?"


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: Hey all, this is a short ****chapter but I promise I'll have another one up really soon. Also, this story has hit 50 Followers! *throws confetti* Thank you all of you, you make this story special 3**

** Enjoy =D**

"Are you okay?" Luther asked, "You've barely spoken since we got to the hair place."

"I'm fine, it's just, the haircut, you know? It's an emotional experience." Lily lied. She was still trying to figure out what Tessa had meant. "_I know what you are..." _she had said. Did she mean she knew Lily tested into Amity? What else could she mean? Lily just couldn't wrap her head around it.

"Well, I think it looks great." Luther said, "and it was so sweet how Gideon dyed his tips to match your pink streak."

Lily smiled a little; she caught a glimpse of herself in a glass display window and stopped to look at her hair again. It was just barely grazing her shoulder, and there was a hot pink streak framing her face. She looked like a whole new person.

"It is nice isn't it? Tessa did a good job. Although I'd be worried about what people will say about yours."

"What do you mean," Luther ran his hand over is hair, which was now bleached white and buzzed short and smiled. "I look sexy?"

"I mean you just transferred from Candor into a faction that wears only black, and you go with white hair. Don't you worry they'll think you're trying to hang on to Candor a little?"

"Not any more than you should worry about that pink streak. Besides, it's just hair. I bleached it because it makes my eyes sparkle. If I wanted to be a Candor I would be a Candor, I don't need hair to prove I belong here."

"Of course." Lily looked at her feet. Could she prove she belonged here? Everyone kept telling her she didn't, and now Tessa was making threats, she was beginning to worry she'd made the wrong choice.

"Stop that." Luther said.

"What?"

"Stop questioning yourself. I can see it on your face. You'll never convince anyone you're Dauntless like that."

Lily frowned, "You can't just expect me to stop behaving like myself. That's lying, I'm not a liar."

"You sound like a Candor; and furthermore, yes I can expect that. You are not in Amity anymore, if you want people to see you as Dauntless you need to act Dauntless. I may be able to tell that you're only here for Gideon..."

"I'm not."

"Sure you aren't, but you need to prove to everyone you are here because it's what you tested into, and nothing else."

"And what makes you think I didn't test into Dauntless?"

"Ha, please," Luther scoffed, "you aren't fooling anyone yet, so let's not overstep our limits 'kay Hun? Fortunately you haven't really interacted with anyone else yet. Starting tomorrow you need to show everyone that you are leaving Amity behind, no more Ms. Nice girl."

Lily tried to process what he was saying. She knew she hadn't tested Dauntless and she knew everyone else could tell that, but... "Being Dauntless doesn't have to mean being cruel." She snapped, "Gideon and his friends are Dauntless, and they're nice."

"They were also born here, they grew up here. Everyone believes they that belong here. And the other transfers and me, we can hold out some hope that we can make it because other people from our factions have done it before. Every Amity who has ever transferred to Dauntless either leaves, gets kicked out, or dies within their first month; that's why no one has tried in years."

Lily felt like she may cry, she couldn't let Luther see that, "I'm going to the training room. I'll see you later." she turned on heel and walked away. When she rounded the corner she bolted. She flew through the training room doors and slammed them behind her before falling to the floor against it and sobbing. In her mind she could here everyone's voices.

"_Lily, are you crazy?"_

"_You don't belong here, Amity." _

"_I wouldn't get too comfortable."_

"_You aren't fooling anyone."_

"_I know what you are."_

Lily needed them to stop. She walked to the middle of the training room and sat on a mat, crossing her legs and breathing deeply. She had learned about meditation from the Amity fitness teacher, Shannon, who taught all the Amity non-aggressive exercises like gymnastics and yoga.

She tried to clear her mind, but that last voice stuck in her mind. _"I know what you are" _Tessa had said. Lily understood now. Tessa had never liked her, or approved of Gideon being friends with her. She thought Lily was just some silly Amity who would crack in the first round and then pull Gideon down with her. But Tessa couldn't frighten her, Lily wouldn't let her. She would prove to Tessa that she belonged here. Tessa and everyone else.


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N A new chapter as promised. And there shall be more soon I assure you. **

**Happy reading 3**

After about an hour in the training room Lily had finally calmed down, and headed back to the dorms. When she got there she was surprised to find everyone still awake, and when she looked at the clock she realized it was only 9:30. She spotted Luther, talking to Maya, and went to join them.

"Hey, you're back." Luther smiled, "Maya and I were just talking strategy. We figured we'd probably start fighting right away, so we were putting our people skills to use, sizing up the competition."

"Why is it just you two, and not anyone else?" Lily asked. "It seemed kind of mean to leave everyone else out, if everyone got together and talked we could probably find a way for us to all get in."

"You just don't get it do you?" Maya asked, although Lily didn't think she really wanted an answer.

"Maya, I got this," Luther put his arm around Lily's shoulders, "look around, Lily, we are the underdogs here. Maya is barely 4'11", I have the body structure of a bean sprout, and you have never fought a day in your life. Now look at everyone else, they are big and tall and strong. They are not interested in helping us because they already know they can make it through, and the worse we are, the better their chances. All we have over them is brainpower, and we need to make it work for us."

"Oh, that's a pretty good point." Lily was finally starting to realize just how grim this looked. There were six other initiate transfers, two from Erudite and four from Candor. Four of them were boys, all beefy and muscular. Lily actually got a good look at just how strong they all were, because at the moment they were standing around comparing muscle sizes. One of them, the boy from Erudite, was nearly six feet tall, and could probably lift Lily with one arm.

The two girls, one from Erudite and one from Candor, looked slightly less formidable. The Erudite girl looked strong, but she was shorter than Lily, and kept looking shiftily at the boys, like they were going to attack her at any moment. The Candor girl was probably the closest match to Lily, body-wise, she was tall and thin. But her spiked black hair, pierced ears and face made her look Dauntless already.

"Why do they all look so scary?" She whispered, "Some of them already have tattoos and piercings, and they're all huge!"

"Now do you understand?" Maya sighed, "These are people who joined Dauntless because they want to hurt people and live with as few rules as possible. So we've been trying to spot their weaknesses based on what we know about them."

"Ok, so what do we know?"

"Well," Luther said, "Jason is big, but he has really low pain tolerance. I learned that last year."

"Then there's Owen," Maya continued, pointing to the Erudite boy, "Huge but slow, and he tires easily. I saw him climbing the stairs at dinner and he was winded halfway up the first flight. If you can dodge him 'till he's tired, then you can beat him."

"Next there's Blair, the Candor girl, she can barely see out her right eye. Maya figured that out earlier."

Across the room a Candor boy banged his head on his bunk and then punched Owen when he laughed.

"That one's Rod," Luther chuckled, "clumsy as a bull, but with twice the anger issues."

"What about the other two?" Lily asked.

"We haven't figured them out yet." Luther sighed.

"Oh, okay then." Lily frowned, "Well then I guess we just need to hope none of us gets paired with them tomorrow. If we can watch them fight then we can figure out their style."

"Speaking of fighting style," Maya said, "are you like some kind of psychopath or something?"

Lily stared at her, "I'm pretty sure that question has nothing to do with fighting style..."

"I mean, you transferred from Amity. Normally Amity/Dauntless transfers are easy to spot, but you weren't. Even now you're still acting like an Amity. You're either a master manipulator or/and a complete idiot for being here. So which is it?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Amities are pacifists, obviously you are not, so how did you keep it so secret? I mean, even Gideon didn't know."

"That's because I'm not hiding anything. I am a pacifist."

Luther shook his head at her.

Lily heard a sharp cruel laugh behind her, and turned to see the other two girls walking towards them.

"A pacifist?" the strong one, Veronica, mocked, "So what are you going to do, hug us all into surrender?"

Blair laughed and smiled at Veronica.

"No," Lily said, "I'm just not going to fight more than I have to."

"Awww, isn't that sweet," Veronica bent down and pinched Lily's cheek. Lily flinched but didn't pull away. "And maybe they'll let you use a water gun instead of a real one. You wouldn't want to accidentally hurt the bad guys, would you?"

She spoke with the same tone Lily used to talk to her 2-year old neighbor, only meaner.

"No, that would be ridiculous..." she whispered.

"Yeah, almost as ridiculous as you being here in the first place, though I have to hand it to you, you take war horse to a whole new level."

Lily's jaw tightened and she bit her tongue. As Veronica and Blair walked away Luther whispered, "Don't just let them walk away, this is your shot."

Lily stood, puffing out her chest and said, "I wouldn't underestimate me if I were you."

Her voice came out smaller than she had expected it to, it was barely a squeak, but Veronica still heard. She turned and laughed again.

"Underestimate you? And how, exactly, is that possible when you have nothing going for you? Every odd is against you right now. I don't need to make any judgments about you. I just need to sit back and watch you fail."

Veronica and Blair cackled as they disappeared through the shower doors, leaving Lily stunned.

Luther reached up and rested his hand on her shoulder, "Hey, Hun, don't be upset, 'kay?"

"Why would I be upset?" Lily smiled, "I just figured out Veronica's weakness."


	14. Chapter 13

**A/N: Hello eve****ryone, so sorry for the super long wait. I was hit with a huge case of writers block =(  
**

**But in the meantime, the story broke 50 followers! I never thought I would have so many people actually wanted to read this story, let alone would be willing to get their inboxes spammed by new chapters =) Thank you all soooo much, and now I think I've kept you waiting long enough. enjoy! **

Gideon yawned loudly as he headed into the training room. He had been up all night worrying about Lily. After the hair salon she had rushed off, claiming that she needed her rest, and he spent the rest of the evening wishing they could have at least gotten some basics in before training began. Xavier and Jackson had tried to reassure him, claiming that there was no way Four would just throw them all in the ring on the first day, and he should just worry about himself for now.

"_I know you want to help her, but it doesn't do her any good if you get kicked out." _Xavier had reminded him.

Now he looked around the room, searching for Lily. He spotted her on the other side; but he also spotted two rings, two lines of punching bags, two of everything. It was clear that he wouldn't be venturing over to the other side of the room anytime soon.

"All right everyone," Lauren called for their attention, "as you can see you are going to be training alongside the transfers, but don't think that means you will be training at the same level as them. You are Dauntless-born, that means there are no excuses with you. I expect every one of you to be the prime example of what new transfers are striving for. You'll will train longer, faster, and harder than them, and you will never once complain about it. Now I'm pretty sure I don't need to teach any of you how to fight, if I do then the faction has already failed you, so everyone get in front of a punching bag and we'll do a run through..."

Gideon found a punching bag, across the room he could see the transfers doing push-ups, punching the bags, and running around the room.

"Why is Four just letting them run wild like that?" he whispered, "Shouldn't he be teaching them or something?"

"Maybe he is," Jackson suggested, "I mean, they need to get in shape, right?"

Gideon shook his head and continued on his bag, he'd really hoped Lily would get some technique training from Four today.

About an hour into training, Lauren had run the dauntless born through every exercise imaginable and now had them competing do see who could do the most of one exercise or another, at the moment it was how many push-ups in a minute. If her intent was just to make them look more polished than the transfers, then it was working. Four hadn't barked a command in forty-five minutes, and the transfers were beginning to look like children on a playground rather than soldiers-in-training.

"Hey Four," Lauren called out "are you running an initiation over there or just babysitting?"

"They're building stamina." He said curtly.

"Really, because it looks like they're just goofing off."

Four ignored Lauren, so she egged him on.

"I mean really, those pansy-cakes wouldn't last a day in a really Dauntless training course."

"It's their first day. They'll improve."

"They're going to fail. I thought you were supposed to be training future Dauntless, not the Factionless of tomorrow. I knew Max made a mistake assigning you this job."

Four clenched his jaw and then shouted, "Abercrombie, Lewis, in the ring!"

Gideon's heart jumped. He watched as Lily slowly climbed into the ring, followed by a large, brutish boy, twice her size. Lily smiled sweetly at him, Gideon wanted to run forward and pull her out of the ring. She wasn't ready. She didn't even seem nervous, she was underestimating the danger in front of entirely!

"Gather up everybody!" Lauren waved them over, "Take a look at your competition."

"Hi Jason," Lily was grinning at her opponent, "this is gonna be fun don't you think?"

"This ain't a drum circle, Amity."

"I know that..." Lily said slowly, regarding him as one might regard a toddler, "it's a fighting ring. You knew that, right?"

Gideon couldn't help but chuckle when he realized, Lily was messing with this guy. He could see it in her eyes. He was a little less worried now, but he still bit his lip and rung his hands when Four began to list off the rules of combat.

"You will fight within the ring only, using whatever hand-to-hand method you see fit. The fight is over when one of you surrenders or when one of you cannot continue. Begin!"

Gideon held his breath as Lily and Jason tiptoed around each other, Jason swung at Lily and she dodged, sidestepping him easily. Another punch and she ducked. Her reflexes were quick, but Gideon knew she couldn't keep up this dance forever. Then lily did something Gideon never saw coming, she kicked. She threw her leg out, overshooting a little, and her shin hit Jason in the arm. He stumbled back a little, grabbing his elbow, and wincing. Gideon could tell from where he stood the kick hadn't been that hard, he wondered what Jason was playing at.

"Oh my gosh, I'm sorry!" Lily gasped, her hands flying to her mouth before reaching out to check Jason's arm. He threw her back against the edge of the ring and she fell. He shook his arm out then pushed her down with his foot to hold her in place. He looked up, smiling at the crowd, pleased with himself.

Gideon stared him down, mentally daring Jason to make eye contact. Jason looked right at Gideon then froze. His face drooped and his eyes widened. Gideon held his gaze, his most primal instincts taking over. He knew he'd told Lily he would let her take care of herself, but she needed him, and if Jason so much as breathed on her again he would rip him to shreds. Jason looked at Lily on the ground and then stepped back. "Well then, get up and fight." he said, he tried to sound strong but he voice cracked. Lily stood slowly, raising her fists. They went back to toeing around each other, and after a few minutes without a hit Four stepped into the ring.

"That's enough," he said, "You're both just embarrassing yourselves. Everyone, go run 20 laps around the training room. And if that is difficult for you then you need to get out now, so no complaints."

"You all go to" Lauren called to the Dauntless born, "show the newbies where they need to be."

As Gideon turned to start his laps he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Four not two inches from his face.

"You can't protect her forever," Four whispered, "She needs to look after herself."

"I don't..." Gideon wasn't sure what to say, but Four had already let him go and begun jogging behind an Erudite born girl who was running too slow for his taste.

Gideon sped up to find Lily, jogging alongside her when he caught up.

"That was good back there." He said.

"It was awful."

"No, you took it like a pro, it was good for your first fight." He reassured her.

"I can't believe I just hit somebody. I've never hit anyone in my life."

Gideon tugged her off the track behind a stack of wrestling mats. She looked like she was going to cry.

"Gideon, I don't want to do that again. I feel so bad. God what was I thinking." She gripped her head like it would fall off if she didn't hold it in place and sobbed.

"Baby, Lily," Gideon gripped her shoulders to steady her, "look at me. You're ok, and Jason is ok. You just need to train."

"No," Lily insisted, "I can't do that again, I just can't."

"So what then? You're just going to leave, become Factionless?"

"I don't know," she cried, "I don't know."

"Okay," Gideon said slowly, pulling her into his arms, "look, we can figure this out. Come meet me back here after dinner tonight. We are going to make this work."

"You promise?" Her eyes shimmered with tears and she looked at him like her whole world relied on his answer, which, he supposed, it did.

"I promise."


	15. Chapter 14

**A/N: So, I want to apologize again for taking so long to update, but I feel like you guys probably are sick of that. So I'll just let you read. (But Rome, you just ****a polo-. _yes I know, moving on_)**

Lily had never felt so ashamed. How could she have deluded herself into thinking this would be easy? She had hurt someone; she had made contact with another person and hurt him, on purpose. She didn't know what she had been thinking, had she thought all Dauntless did was run around and climb things? She didn't belong here.

When she kicked Jason a sense of dread had fallen through her, she couldn't feel that way again. She kept trying to rationalize it, telling herself that it was just self-defense, that it was just training; but none of it made a difference. She could hear her mother's voice telling her, "There is never an excuse for violence, Lily. When you make excuses for violence you allow it to enter your soul." She wondered if her mother was ashamed of her for choosing Dauntless, or if she thought Lily was evil now. That's what she had been taught after all, that the Dauntless were cruel and evil. But with Gideon she had convinced herself that it wasn't true; Gideon was sweet and kind, there had to be room for kindness in Dauntless.

She didn't go to dinner that night. Instead, she waited until everyone had left and then returned to the training room. She stood in the middle of the ring, replaying the events of that morning in her head.

_She was standing across from Jason, her arms up to defend her self. She had remembered what Luther had told her, that Jason had a low pain tolerance. She looked in his eyes and saw them shift to her stomach. He made a slight move towards her and she new he was about to swing at her. As his arm extended, she jumped back and kicked. The kick was so soft it was almost comical; it didn't even sting her foot. But then he was wincing and gripping his arm, she had hurt him. For a moment she was proud, but then the pain in his eyes melted her heart and she let her guard down. Amity instinct kicked in and she was apologizing, her eyes filling with tears. And then she saw his eyes move again, this time to her shoulder. She saw him lunge but didn't stop him. He pushed her back and she fell to the ground. She could have stayed on her feet, and she had plenty of time to get up; but she stayed down. As his foot fell on top of her she winced at the pain, but didn't fight back. This was her punishment; this is what she deserved for hurting him. _

The one thing Lily couldn't figure out was why he had stopped. He had her pinned, he could have knocked her out, but he didn't. She wondered if maybe he had just wanted another go at her, to hurt her as much as he could and make her surrender. It seemed like the sort of thing he would do.

"You're early." She looked up at Gideon as he locked the training room door and joined her in the ring.

"Just eager to get started." She smiled; she couldn't let him see how scared she was.

"Now that's the attitude I like to see," he tapped her on the nose and then dropped to sit cross-legged on the floor, "sit down."

He looked so happy, so carefree. She wondered if he really was this positive, or if he was faking it like her. She felt awful lying to him, and she wasn't sure if him lying back would make her feel better or worse.

"Do you think I'm weak?" she asked.

"Of course not," he reached out and took her hand, "we all freak out a little the first time we hurt somebody. You're just having your moment later than the rest of us."

His icy blue eyes were so accepting, so warm; she threw herself into his arms, holding tightly to him as she started to cry.

"Gideon, I don't know if I can do this. I don't want to hurt people, I don't."

Gideon held her tight, stroking her hair and rocking her as she cried. Once she had calmed herself a little he pulled back and cupped her face, kissing her cheek and whispering, "It's going to be okay. I promised you that everything would work out and it will."

He wiped the tears off her face and pulled her to her feet, "What happened today was totally normal Lily, all you need is training."

"I thought today was training." She said.

"For your body, yes, but we need to train your mind. You need to escape what Amity taught you, and learn the difference between fighting and violence."

"What's the difference?"

"Violence is done out of a desire to cause pain. Fighting in the ring is sport. It's for fun, or for physical fitness. And fighting for necessity, that's just doing what you have to do."

"But, I hurt him." She couldn't get past that.

"No, you didn't, I saw that kick. He was faking in in hopes that you would feel bad. It was dirty trick and it worked, you can't let someone get to you like that again."

"But, if her was just faking it…that was the closest I've ever come to purposely hurting someone before. If I can't even do that right how am I supposed to get good at this?"

"You're going to practice. Here, in a safe space. You're going to get used to the feel of fighting another person, by fighting me."

"What? But I don't want to hurt you. You're one of the last people on Earth I would ever want to-"

"I know," Gideon cut her off, "that's why you'll be practicing against me. If you can get used to fighting someone you care about, it will make it easier to distance yourself when fighting people you don't know or don't like. You're not going to only be fighting Jason; you'll have to fight Luther too, and any other friends you make."

"But I…" Lily trailed off. She couldn't hit Gideon; it would be like hitting a puppy. It was just too mean.

"No buts. I promise you, I can take whatever you throw at me. Now, hit me." He took a fighting stance and bounced around a little. He looked kind of ridiculous if she was being honest.

"I can't," she giggled a little, "especially not with you bouncing around like that. You look too sweet."

"Fine, I'll try to look meaner." He planted his feet and snarled, twisting his face into an overdone sneer. "How's this?" he asked through gritted teeth.

"Not much better." She laughed.

"Come on," he smiled, "just hit me. Right here." He turned sideways and flexed his arm, pointing where he wanted her to hit.

She made a fist and punched lightly.

"Like this," he took her hand, forming it into a fist, "you punch with these knuckles right here, and you put your whole body into it." He placed one hand on her hip and the other on her fist, slowly moving her body through the steps.

"Now try again." He held out his arm again.

She punched a little harder, holding back at the last second.

"You can do better than that, come on!"

She swung again, this time feeling her hand collide with his arm, a dull pain spreading through her fist.

"One more, really go for it." This time she punched at full force, exactly how he'd shown her. Her fist on his arm made a dull thumping noise, and when she pulled her hand back his arm was red.

"Oh my gosh, are you okay?" she asked

"I'm great" He smiled, "and that was really good."

"But, your arm is all red." She stared at the fading mark she had left on his skin, her eyes wide. She couldn't believe she had done that. Se hadn't known her body was capable of so much force. She felt terrified and strong and ashamed and powerful. Her breath was short and her heart was racing, she wasn't sure if she should apologize, or smile, or spontaneously combust.

"That's nothing," Gideon chuckled, "my little sister has done worse to me. But it's a good start."

"Okay, but, can we be done for now? I think if I do that again I might start crying and then never stop."

"Of course," He pulled her into his chest and hugged her, "it's all okay, you did great. I'm so proud of you." He cupped her chin and kissed her, "You're going to get really great at this. I just know it."


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N: Hey everybody. This is a bit of a filler chapter but I promise there'll be more really soon. The past few weeks have just been really busy. I hope you all like it anyway.**

There were no more fights that week. Four had told them all they were "too pathetic" to fight and they would be working on fitness all week, which pretty much meant running all day. Meanwhile, during her training with Gideon, Lily was improving rapidly. She was no longer afraid to hit Gideon, although she avoided it whenever she could, and they had begun sparring. She realized quickly that she couldn't take a hit very well, and she still refused to throw the first punch; they mostly focused on dodging.

At the end of training Friday night, Four informed them all that fights would resume on Monday, "And if anyone makes a fool out of me I'll see to it you're Factionless by dinner." he added.

"Are you nervous?" Luther asked Lily.

"A little, but I've been practicing on my own a lot and I think I'm ready."

"I hope I get someone tough." Maya said, "You know, like Veronica or Owen. Someone big."

"Why, do you have a death wish?" Luther asked.

"That is exactly why." She stuck her finger in his face, "Attitudes like that; you all underestimate me."

"Well sorry, it's just you are like, pocket sized" He scoffed.

"You're one to talk, Last Jumper."

Luther just gaped at her.

"Maya, there's no need to take shots like that." Lily scolded, "If you want to tease him just comment on his willowy frame and pixie face."

"Hey!" Luther laughed, staring at her in amazement, "I don't think I've ever heard you tease someone before."

"Teasing? I was just pointing out…" Lily suddenly felt very bad, "I'm sorry Luther. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

"And she's back." Maya rolled her eyes, "You have got to grow a spine Lily."

Lily pouted and they walked in awkward silence for a minute.

"I've got an idea," Luther said, "let's all go do something really fun tonight. Something really… Dauntless."

"Like what?" Lily asked.

"Like," Luther looked around the hall they were in, as if expecting an idea to jump out at him. He froze and a huge smile stretched across his face, "Like get tattoos!"

"Sounds fine to me." Maya shrugged.

"I don't know, I don't think I want to get something permanently inked on my body on a whim." Lily had actually been planning a tattoo design for a while, she even had a sketch in her bag, but it just wasn't ready.

"But you still wanted to check out the shop, right?" Maya asked, "didn't you get in trouble on the first day for stopping in front of it."

"I guess I did. Okay, let's go."

They made their way over to the tattoo shop, which was mostly empty. In one corner, a woman with black and green hair was pressing a black patch attatched to a tube to a man's arm.

"What's happening over there?" Lily asked.

"That's how they do the tattoos." Luther told her.

"I thought they used needles."

"We have a couple different methods," a voice behind them said. They turned and saw a man behind the payment counter. "if you want one of our classic designs, that's those on the wall, then we can put them on in a couple minutes using the lasers. If you want anything custom then we either use a tattoo machine, that's this thing here," he held up something that kind of looked like an upside down spray can with a needle and a handle, "or we can do it manually. That means I just take a big needle and poke you a few hundred times by hand."

Lily was now absolutely terrified by this man, and by the looks on their faces, she imagined Maya and Luther were too.

"So, any of you know what you want?" The man asked.

"I think we'll just look around." Lily said, composing herself.

"Alright, my name is Adam, come find me when you decide."

The three teens split up, browsing around the shop. The designs were all really pretty, but Lily just couldn't see her putting any of them on her body. She went back over to Adam's desk.

"Excuse me?" She said, her voice coming out tinier than she'd have liked, "Do you think I could show you a design I've been working on? Please?"

Adam looked her over for a minute before nodding, "Sure, what've you got?"

She took her sketch out of her bag a laid it on the table. The sketch was of a girl with long blonde hair and a flower crown, surrounded by flowers that blended together into a tie-dye sort of pattern. Mixed into the flowers, one could vaguely make out the symbols of each faction.

"I was thinking about doing it as a sleeve." She told Adam.

"You made this?" she nodded. "It's good, really good. I'd make the outlines of the flowers darker but otherwise it's great. You're a new initiate, right?"

"Yes."

"Well, we could use artists like you here. Have you thought about what you're doing after initiation?"

"Is that your way of asking me to work here?" She said hopefully.

"Don't get too excited," he held up his hand, "you've still got a long way to go. But I'd consider it"

"That would be amazing!" Lily squealed.

"What'd I say about getting excited? Moving on, a design like this is going to take hours, not to mention it'll be expensive. We usually charge based on the size of a tattoo, but since this is going to have to be done with the machine instead of laser work it'll be more like an hourly rate. I'd estimate it around 60 points. I doubt you've got that much right now."

"No, I don't, but thanks for the estimate." Lily folded up her sketch and began to walk away.

"Did I mention employees get a discount?" Adam called after her.

Lily was feeling pleased with herself for the rest of the night. In the end, only Maya had actually gotten a tattoo, a black rose on the back of her hand with a thorny stem curling around her arm.

"It's kind of perfect for you." Lily told her that night, "You know, it's small and beautiful, but also dangerous. Just like you."

"Yeah, sure. 'Cause everyone thinks I'm so dangerous." Maya frowned.

"I do, I know you think everyone underestimates you, but I think you're really brave."

"Why? You don't know anything about me."

"I know you transferred here when you knew no one would take you seriously. I know you fight just as hard as I do to be respected here. And you aren't afraid to fight dirty either."

Maya smiled and grabbed Lily's shoulder, "You're brave too, Lily. You really are."

**Side Note: To the guest user who told me that they would stab my eye with a butter knife and/or kill me if I didn't continue to update, please don't make comments like that again. I know you were just trying to be funny or impassioned or something and I'm sure you didn't mean it literally, but I've seen Misery a few too many times so please let's keep reviews friendly. **


	17. Chapter 16

**A/N: Yikes, it has been awhile hasn't it? I hope you haven't all forgotten about me =( Once again, I have to thank everyone who has faved/followed/reviewed, you are the reason I write. I hope you all like this and I'll try to update more often, I promise.**

Lily spent the next two days nearly living in the training room; Gideon still couldn't get her to hit a moving target.

"It feels wrong, like you're running away and I'm chasing you." She would say.

"If I'm running, don't hit. But I am not running away, I'm coming after you. You have to remember that darling, they will hurt you if you don't strike first."

"Not all of them. Not Luther. Not Maya."

"Yes, they will." He cupped her chin and looked into her eyes, "They want to be in Dauntless as bad as you, if you give them the chance, they will take it."

"But they're not like that!" She insisted, "They're my friends!"

"I know that," Gideon always spoke so softly to her, "but desperation makes people do bad things. They can be your friends outside the ring; but during initiation, they are just like anyone else."

Lily couldn't imagine Luther and Maya being so heartless, but they claimed they were Dauntless, and Gideon knew Dauntless better than anyone she knew. She had to trust his judgment.

By Sunday night, Gideon's patience was growing short. Lily was fast, she had no problem dodging his attacks, but if she couldn't hit she couldn't win.

"Lily, if you don't throw a punch Four will declare you the loser again. He won't let you just dodge until you wear someone out."

"He might." She sounded so hopeful, so sure of herself.

Gideon felt himself getting angry; he wanted to scream at her, to shake her until she realized it wasn't all that simple. But when he looked at her face he just couldn't hurt her. Instead, he just frowned and said, "Sure. Maybe he will. But maybe you just shouldn't risk it."

"Look, I'll try harder. But it's just hard. You know that."

"I know darling, I know. You'll learn. Let's try again, please?"

"Ok" she returned to her fighting stance, double-checking her body's position.

They began to move around the ring, going through the motions again. Gideon stepped forward, swinging at her, missing on purpose like he always did. He knew it was stupid, but he couldn't bring himself to actually hit Lily, so he always aimed a little off, or pulled back at the last moment, so his fists only ever grazed her. He looked at Lily and saw her eyes squint, and in an instant they became cold and striking. He felt her fist collide with his stomach and doubled over. She brought her elbow down on his back and he fell to the ground. He tried to stand, but Lily pressed her foot into his tailbone, holding him down.

"Give up?" She asked.

Gideon rolled and grabbed her arm, pulling her under him and pinning her down.

Lily planted her feet, remembering what Gideon had taught her. Low center, feet planted, fists up. Gideon swung at her and she followed him with her eyes.

_Arm extended, ribs and stomach exposed, easy target._

She swung at his ribs, her fist colliding with the toned muscle. As he doubled over she brought her foot up.

_Bent over, exposed back, weak knees._

She slammed her foot down onto his back, making sure to hit him a little to the side and avoid his spine.

_Flat on the ground, he'll try to push up, butt first, repress his tailbone. _

She stepped down on his back, putting just enough pressure to keep him down.

"Give up?"

Next thing she knew, he had her underneath him. She knew she should be thinking of how to get away, but all she could focus on was Gideon. His eyes were like ice, but they made her feel warm and flustered. His hands held her down and she couldn't imagine wanting to get away. All she could think was, "I never want to leave this spot." She whispered it softly without even noticing.

Gideon gazed down at Lily; his ribs and back still throbbed from where she hit him, but he could hardly feel it over the pounding of his own heart. He had never seen her so powerful. Even here, pinned beneath him, she radiated strength. He could feel her body, once soft and frail, now hard with muscles.

"I never want to leave this spot." She whispered. He knew exactly what she meant. He usually tried to push these thoughts away, but right now all he wanted was to feel her pressed against him for all eternity. He looked into her eyes, as blue and endless as the sky, and he was overwhelmed with one thought. One feeling that flowed through his whole body, until he felt like nothing else in the world had ever been as true as, "I love you." He said it softly at first, testing the sound of it on his lips, before saying it louder.

"I love you Lily."

"I…I love you too." She smiled softly at him. "I'm sorry I hit you."

"It's ok." He chuckled, "I'm so proud of you, really."

She wrapped her arms around him, pulling him down to kiss her. For a split second he hovered over her in perfect balance; then his arms gave out and he collapsed on top of her. She let out a squeak of shock and he rolled off of her quickly.

"I'm so sorry, are you ok?"

"I'm fine." She laughed and sat up. Her eyes sparkled like diamonds as she reached out to touch his cheek. "Your face is scratchy." She said.

"I'm sorry." Gideon wasn't sure what else to say to that.

"No," She laughed, "I love it…I love you."

"I love you."

Lily woke Monday morning with the sound of Gideon's voice echoing in her ears. She still couldn't believe what had happened last night. She never let herself go like that, to give in to her stronger side. Hitting Gideon hadn't felt good so much as just not bad. She'd felt powerful, like she had nothing to fear.

Walking into the training room, she found herself grinning uncontrollably looking at the matt where her and Gideon had fought and kissed the night before.

"You look pretty happy for someone walking into immanent doom." Luther commented.

"Immanent? I am so ready for this." She knew that wasn't why she was smiling, but she also knew she wasn't lying. She was ready for this.

"You really believe that don't you?" he said, shocked, "Well then, let's go see whom you're up against."

Four had set up a board that would match them all up for fights and automatically keep score of their wins and losses. Luther was up first, against Veronica.

"Oh god, I'm screwed." He muttered.

"No you are not." Lily turned and grabbed his shoulders, "Remember, she'll underestimate you. Just play to your strengths and be quick. You can do this."

"Easy for you to say." Luther rolled his eyes, "You're fighting Maya."

**Note: Lily and Gideon did not "do it" in this chapter. My editor said that's what it sounds like, but no. Just fyi.**


	18. Chapter 17

Lily froze, "I'm fighting Maya?"

"Yeah, and she looks geared up too." Luther pointed to where Maya was stretching and shaking herself out, clearly preparing for a fight.

"But, Maya wouldn't want to hurt me, right?"

"I don't know, she is pretty eager to prove herself. I think she may be desperate."

"_Well so am I._" Lily thought.

She made her way over to set of punching bags and began running through the moves Gideon had taught her. A few minutes later, Maya took up the bag next to her.

"So, you and me today, huh?" Maya said.

"Guess so, don't go too easy on me, 'kay?"

"Wouldn't dream of it."

Lily watched Maya at her bag; she was hitting it with full force, grunting every time she made contact.

_She's trying to intimidate me. If she keeps this up until our fight she'll be too sore and tired. _

Lily felt bad analyzing Maya like this, but she knew that if she wanted to win she needed to know her opponent. Maya was fast and she wouldn't hold back, if Lily wanted to win this one she was going to have to finish it quickly. She would have to strike first.

She heard Gideon's voice in her head, "_She's not your friend in the ring…if you give her a chance she'll take it."_

She turned her back on Maya to watch Luther's fight. He held is own for a while, slipping and sliding under Veronica's fists like a snake, but eventually she got him in a choke hold. He held on for a full minute before passing out.

"Someone get him." The voice wasn't Four's. Lily looked to see Eric standing by the ring. His eyes met hers and he smirked, "How about you Amity. This should be right up your alley."

Her eyes narrowed for a moment before she remembered, "_Everyone will underestimate you. That will be your best advantage." _She smiled sweetly at Eric and said "Right away sir" throwing in a little salute that was probably a step to far. Eric just rolled his eyes.

Lily stepped into the ring and drug Luther out. She fanned his face as he started to come to, "Good morning sleepy head." She smiled.

"Whoa, what happened?"

"Veronica choked you out. You put up a good fight though. I didn't realize you were so slippery."

"Slippery?"

"Yeah, like, you slipped around her a lot?"

"Oh, yeah."

"Amity," Eric's voice boomed, "you're up! You too, Tiny."

"Oops, gotta go," Lily smiled, she pecked Luther's head before getting up, and "You just stay lying down. This won't take long."

She stepped into the ring and took her stance. She glanced at Four who waved his hands in a "get on with it" motion.

Maya began to shuffle around her, trying to get out of Lily's clear vision. Lily breathed deeply, trying to recall the part of her that had helped her against Gideon last night.

_Low to the ground. Too fast to grab on to. He fists are bruised, her arms are too relaxed, and she's already worn herself out. Her head is exposed, so if I just…_

Lily kicked out, aiming high; she saw Maya's eyes grow wide just before her foot collided with the other girl's temple. Maya crumpled to the ground, unconscious.

For a moment no one spoke. Four stepped forward to check on Maya; after making sure she was breathing, he lifted her up.

"You certainly don't waste time, do you, Lily?"

She just shrugged, "Is she going to be ok?" she asked, following Four out of the ring.

"She'll be fine, but she'll have a major headache when she wakes up.

"Her well being isn't your concern." Eric said, approaching them, "You won, that should be all you care about."

Lily straightened up and glared at Eric, "She's competition, that doesn't make her my enemy. I want her losing, not dead."

"If she's dead she's losing."

Lily could not believe anyone was so heartless as Eric. He acted as if human lives were worthless.

"Well she's not dead." Four interrupted, "She was actually pretty lucky. If Lily had hit her even an inch off she could've been seriously hurt."

"I knew I wouldn't" Lily said, "I calculated that kick exactly. I knew what I was doing."

Four stared at her, she could see the wheels in his head turning as he examined her like she was an alien. Eric just scoffed and then called out for the next fight.

On the floor, Maya was beginning to wake up.

"Whoa, what hit me?" She rubbed her head.

"Lily's foot," Luther was grinning like a maniac and stifling laughter. When Maya wasn't looking he threw Lily a thumbs up.

Lily smiled proudly, but Maya frowned at her.

"What's wrong?" Lily asked.

Maya said nothing.

"Come on Maya, don't be like that." Luther frowned, "You lost, get over it."

"Shut the hell up, Luther." She stood up, stumbling a little bit, and went to sit on the other side of the ring.

"Did I do something wrong?" Lily asked, "Should I have let her fight longer?"

"Absolutely not, if she'd gotten at you she would have won. You were just looking out for yourself."

Lily felt a twinge of guilt; she had always taken pleasure in helping others. The idea of acting selfishly made her sick to her stomach.

"But I knew how much she wanted this, and she's my friend."

"Not anymore."

"She wouldn't really stop being my friend over this, would she?"

"Um, probably. I mean, you did make her look bad. Even I'm a little jealous."

"But why?"

"Well…" Luther paused, " Maya and I have been training for this for a long time, and we both lost. You joined on a whim and couldn't even throw a punch last week. It's really crazy how quickly you picked this all up."

"But it wasn't a whim, I'd wanted this for year. It just, wasn't the only thing I wanted."

"I know that. Look, Maya's probably just pissed that she didn't get put up against someone else. She'll win tomorrow and then she'll get over this."

"Liar." Lily giggled.

"Yeah," Luther nodded solemnly, "but really don't worry about it too much. If she can't get over this then she's not a good friend."

"I guess you're right." But something still wasn't sitting right with Lily. She felt like she needed to make this right.


	19. Chapter 18

**Hey y'all. this chapter's short, but you're also getting three updates in one week so I hope you can all be happy with that. And, as usual, thank you to all the lovely people who fave/follow/review. **

At lunch Lily was greeted by Xavier and Jackson standing and cheering "Lily! Lily!"

She smiled as she sat next to them and Gideon put his arm around her.

"Saw your fight, baby." he kissed her forehead, "you did great."

"Great?" Xavier said, "Great doesn't cut it! She was BAD ASS!"

"That kick!" Jackson chimed in, "It was just like BOOM and then the bitch went down!"

"But now Maya's mad at me." She pouted.

"Just because you won? That's ridiculous." Xavier said, "I mean, your boyfriend destroyed me today and yet we are still the best of friends." He threw his arms around Gideon and ruffled his hair to prove his point.

"Down boy," Gideon shoved him away, "I'm sorry Maya's taking this poorly dear, but she'll get over it."

"I hope so."

"How'd your fight go Luther?" Xavier asked, "I was in the ring at the same time as you."

"I got choked out." He looked ashamed.

"Aww, you'll get them next time, Tiger." He patted Luther's back and Luther blushed.

The rest of the afternoon went smoothly, although Maya still wouldn't speak to or look at Lily. At the end of the day, Four called them all around a large digital screen.

"As of this afternoon," he began, "these are your rankings. As you win and lose fights your scores will fluctuate. Ties will be broken based on how long your fights last. Shorter fights mean higher ranking for winners, lower ranking for losers. Take a good look, because anyone currently in the red zone is on the cut list. You do not want to be on the cut list."

Lily waited for the crowd to thin out before skimming the list. Luther was in the red, Maya was dead last, but she couldn't find her name. Her eyes slowly moved upward, searching. She smiled when she saw Gideon in second place, and then her jaw dropped. Her name was first on the list.

"Are you trying to push me out?" She felt Gideon's arm wrap around her waist.

"I-I'm first. How am I first?" She stuttered.

"You heard Four, the quicker you win the more points you get. You ended your fight in 20 seconds flat. Keep fighting like that and you'll be first for the whole stage."

"But Maya hates me now, I don't want that to happen again."

"You won't fight Maya again, everyone else already hates you, no offense. Except Luther, and he's smart enough not to take it personally."

"You think so?"

"I know so." Gideon kissed her forehead and they walked to dinner. Hand-in-hand.

That night Lily and Gideon agreed to take a break from training and just rest, but Lily still found herself wandering to the training room, late at night. She sat in the middle of the room and closed her eyes, thinking about everything that had happened that day. She replayed the whole day in her mind, everything she could have done differently; with each breath, she released just a little bit of her stress. After about an hour, she finally felt at peace with her choices. She stood and left the training room, but as she rounded a corner in the Pit she collide with another person.

"Watch it!" the other person shouted.

"I'm sorry." She looked up at who she had run in to. It was Tessa, "Oh, it's you. I'm sorry Tessa."

Tessa eyed her suspiciously, "What are you doing out so late?"

"I was training. What are _you _doing out so late."

"I was…with a friend." Tessa was lying, "I heard you won your fight today, good job."

"Thanks, I guess I'm coming out pretty Dauntless after all." Lily faked her signature smile. She'd been cautious around Tessa ever since the incident in the hair salon.

"I guess so. You're playing your part really well."

"I honestly don't now what you're talking about Tessa. I have to go now." Lily pushed past her and walked down the hall. As soon as she rounded the corner, she ran, not stopping until she reached the dorms. When she walked in, everyone was in bed. The only light was shining softly under Maya's sheet. It quickly went out and Maya slipped under her covers, pretending to sleep.

"That's kind of juvenile, don't you think?"

"So is sneaking out at night to see your boyfriend." Maya muttered.

"I wasn't with Gideon." Lily walked over and stood by Maya's bunk, "Are you going to be mad at me forever?"

"No, you'll get what's coming to you." Maya said.

A chill ran up Lily's spine, "What is that supposed to mean?"

"You aren't what you're supposed to be. They don't like that."

Lily though back to Tessa in the salon, "_I know what you are", _she had said.

"You're just trying to scare me." Lily said, "It won't work."

Maya ignored her; after waiting a moment, Lily returned to bed.

All the peace she thought she had found just half an hour ago was now gone, and she was filled only with a cold sense of dread.


	20. Chapter 19

**A/N: Hey all, so I'm having a really bad day, which means I locked myself in my room doing nothing but writing all day. So now this story has pre-written chapters. Which is good news for all of you lovely people who are sticking by Gideon and Lily. Let me know what you think.**

**Next update will be wednesday =)**

The next several weeks passed in such a blur, Lily barely had time to catch her breath. Mornings were spent fighting, and Lily's head kick had become her signature; she'd won every fight so far using that move. After lunch they would learn how to climb, throw knives, shoot, or sometimes they would just run for hours. Lily had been nervous around all the weapons at first, but with Gideon and Luther's help she had gotten the hang of them ok. She was better with guns than knives; with a gun she just had to fire, then she could look away. Knives didn't give you that pleasure.

She had also been introduced to few "Dauntless traditions", such as performance fights, which she wasn't fond of, and alcohol, which she _really _was not fond of. But she had come to love the late-night parties, where the Dauntless would bang on trash cans and stomp their feet and shout out like an ancient chant. The experience was more cleansing than anything Lily had felt before, she could just leave her own body and escape into the voices of the people around her.

It was the morning after one such party when Lily was assigned to fight Luther. At the time, Luther was the highest rank below the cutline; he had won against Jason and Blair, but Rod and Maya had both taken him down quickly.

"You need to win one fight," Lily had said the day before, "you can lose one too, but you have to last at least five minutes."

"How do you know that?" He asked, "I gave up hope trying to figure these scores out ages ago."

"It's not that hard if you pay attention. They move you up one position for every two minutes you last, for losses that is. You only get bonuses for winning if you do it in under a minute. The two people you'll have to fight are Owen and me. Owen tires easily so he's going to try and finish you off quick, you'll have no problem with him, and the difficulty would be in trying to finish him as quick as he'd try to finish you."

"And I have to either win against you, or last five minutes. Well then, I'm pretty much screwed." Luther turned and walked away without another word.

Now, stepping in to the ring against him, Lily was thinking about that conversation. She had only lost one fight so far, to Rod. He had stumbled during a punch and wound up landing on top of her, she had hit her head and blacked out. It was a technicality and only dropped her down one place; she reclaimed her first place rank the next day. But Luther, he was barely making it through. He hadn't mentioned the fight at all to her, but she knew he was scared. So this time, when she kicked at his head, she aimed a little to the right and narrowly missed him. He grabbed her leg and pulled her down and they wound up almost nose-to-nose. The rest of their fight was like a dance, each slipping beside each other, Lily occasionally "dodging" right into Luther's punches. It only lasted 45 seconds, then Lily feigned a kick at Luther's feet, dropping her head right into his swinging fist. He barely touched her, but she threw herself back and closed her eyes, doing her best to lie motionless as Luther was declared the winner and she was carried off by Four. After what she considered a decent amount of time to be unconscious, she opened her eyes to see Luther frowning at her.

"Why did you do that?" He asked.

"Do what?"

"You let me win."

"No I didn't." Lily stared at him with big, innocent eyes.

"I know when you're lying." He scowled.

"No you don't, you're not a Candor. You're a Dauntless. And you just won a fight. And now you're going to be happy about it."

Luther stared at her for a moment, before throwing his arms around her and whispering, "Thank you, Lily. Thank you so much."

"For what?" She asked, her face blank, "I haven't done anything at all."

On the scoreboard, Luther's name slid up two places, pushing a Dauntless boy named Ralph into the bottom passing slot, and Maya back into the cut zone.

Lily was nervous about fighting Veronica. The former Erudite had won every fight so far, and was currently in third place on the rankings, behind Gideon and Lily. She was strong, fast, and had an uncanny knack for wrestling. If Lily could stay on her feet she'd be okay, but if Veronica got hold of her she knew she'd lose.

Gideon had, of course, assured her that being afraid to lose was silly, her spot was secure; but the thought of dropping ranks right before the second stage worried her. She had no idea what was next and she wanted to keep her odds as high as possible.

In the dorms that night, as Lily was returning from the showers, she saw a crowd of transfers in the middle of the room. They were laughing and jeering at something. As she came closer, she saw Maya in the middle of the circle. She was hunkered down like a dog, her eyes wild. She tried to back away from the shouting crowd but they had her surrounded, when she got too close to the edge someone shoved her, and she was pushed around the circle. Everyone was shouting, "Loser! Factionless! Wimp! Pansycake!"

Everything slowed down around Lily as she rushed towards the crowd, pushing through them. She grabbed Maya and stood between her and the group as she pulled her out of the swarm.

"Stay away from her!" She shouted, "All of you, stay back!"

"Move aside, Amity," Veronica stepped forward, "unless you want to take her place."

"Fine," Lily said, straightening up, "I will." She stepped forward, standing inches away from Veronica.

"Oh really?" Veronica shoved her lightly, "You sure you want to do that?"

Lily was shaking slightly as they all started to surround her. Out the corner of her eye, she saw Maya run out the door. She knew they all wanted her blood, they wanted revenge and she couldn't take them all at once. Maya was gone, Luther was nowhere to be seen, for the first time in her life, she realized, she was completely alone.


	21. Chapter 20

**A/N Hey everybody, so I'm having a birthday party today and I thought I'd mix up tradition by giving you all a birthday gift! Or a terrible, Maleficent-esque curse depending on how this chapter makes you all feel. **

Lily felt their hands on her, shoving, grabbing, and then hitting. She didn't try to fight back, she just curled into a ball and covered her head. Once she was too low to the ground to hit, they started kicking her; her arms ached and her vision was going blurry. She heard a bang like a gunshot.

"What is going on in here?" Four's voice echoed from the doorway, "All of you break it up!" Everyone retreated and Four moved forward to pull Lily to her feet.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

She nodded, still trying to catch he breath. She saw Maya standing in the doorway.

"Do you all think you're strong now?" He asked the group, "Do you think you're tough? You're not. There is nothing brave or strong about attacking someone who cannot, or will not fight back, especially when they are outnumbered. Everyone who took part in this tonight, will be dropped one rank, and your fights tomorrow will be judged with two points already against you. Perhaps you'll all learn a lesson from that. Dauntless is about defending people, not attacking them." He turned back to Maya and Lily, "You two, come with me."

Maya and Lily followed Four out of the room and down the hall. Four halted and peered around the corner, as if making sure they were alone.

"What happened in there?"

"They were attacking Maya," Lily said, "She needed help."

"No, I didn't! I had it under control."

"Maya, they had you surrounded, I just wanted to help."

"It was your fault they attacked me in the first place! I don't need your help!"

"Alright!" Four got between them, "That's enough. Look, neither of you are in trouble so just…go take a walk or something."

Maya glared between the two of them, her fists clenched, then she turned and stormed away.

"Thanks for saving me, Four." Lily looked at her feet.

"Whatever, just, try not to be so stupid next time." Four shook his head and walked off, muttering about transfers and children and how they would untimely cause his death.

Without any idea of what else to do, Lily made her way off to the training rooms; but when she got there, she found them already occupied. Luther and Xavier were sitting in the middle of the ring and she could hear laughter echoing off the walls.

"Oh, I'm sorry." She was embarrassed to have interrupted, even though it was a public space, and they were only talking.

"Lily," Xavier smiled widely at her, a smile which quickly fell as she moved into the light, "oh my god, what happened to you?"

"I-I got into a fight."

"I'm getting Gideon." Xavier darted off and Luther moved forward to look her over.

"Who did this?" He asked.

"All of them, I guess." She suddenly really didn't feel like talking, and when Luther moved in to hug her, she pushed him away. She had never done that to anyone before. She sat down on a bench and pulled her legs into herself. Her eyes were working, but she couldn't see. She could hear Luther demanding more information, but she wasn't listening. She felt trapped in her own mind and all she wanted was to fall asleep and forget it all.

When Gideon arrived he rushed towards her, kneeling at her feet and looking her over.

"Oh my god, I'll kill them. Whoever did this, I'll kill them. Who did this to you Lily?"

Lily looked down at Gideon, his eyes so full of fear and pity; he thought she was so weak. Her anger boiled stronger than ever before, she wanted to scream and rage. She had never felt as much anger as she felt right now, and all she could think was that this was all Veronica's fault. It was Veronica who had started it all, who had been bullying and harassing everyone for weeks. She felt her own soul darken thinking about her and her condescending sneer, and she wanted to put her in her place.

"Don't worry about it. I've got her."

When Lily stepped into the ring the next morning, her rage had not settled. She thought of everything Veronica had done those past weeks: bullying her, choking out Luther, attacking Maya. For the first time in her life, she wanted to make someone hurt. She had planned to end this fight quickly, but now she wanted to draw it out. She wanted to see her bleed, and cry, and beg.

They shuffled around each other; Veronica still had that disgusting sneer on her face. When she lunged at Lily, she aimed right for the bruises on her arms. The bruises Veronica had given her. Lily didn't calculate this time, didn't focus on her breathing or Veronica's movements. She focused on her rage at the fact that after 2 weeks and 6 victories, these people still didn't respect her. And now she would show them all, she could be cruel. She could be Dauntless.

Her fists and feet flew at veronica, moving faster than she could imagine. One punch hit Veronica square in the face, and she heard her nose crack. On her next swing, Veronica caught hold of her wrist and pulled her down, wrestling her to the ground. Lily scratched and struggled to get out of Veronica's grasp. The large girl had her arms around Lily, pinning her arms to her sides. The blood from her broken nose trickled over Lily's shoulder and Lily swung her head to hit Veronica's nose again. She broke free of her grasp and spun around her, kicking her to her knees. Lily threw herself onto Veronica's back and wrapped her arm around her neck, squeezing her windpipe. Veronica clawed at Lily's forearm, trying to break free. Lily pulled her in tighter and felt Veronica's body start to weaken. As her opponent fell unconscious, Lily caught sight of reflection in a piece of metal on the side of the ring. She couldn't recognize herself, her eyes were cold and her face was stony. The expression reminded her of Eric. She dropped Veronica and stepped back, shaking, and ran from the ring.


	22. Chapter 21

**A/N Short short chapter, but the next one is written and in the editing ****process so I'll put it up tomorrow and it's longer I promise.**

Lily ran without knowing where she was going or what she was running from. She turned corners and climbed stairs, she got the feeling she was moving in circles, but she was afraid that if she stopped, something terrible would happen. After what felt like both hours and seconds, she collapsed at the railing by the Chasm. She clung to the rail, breathing heavily, and blocked out anything but the sound of the river rushing beneath her. She wanted to get lost in the river, to be engulfed underwater and never come up.

She was startled from her thoughts by a hand on her shoulder; she opened her eyes to see Gideon looking at her, his blue eyes full of worry.

"Darling, what happened back there?" he asked.

"I- I-" Lily burst into tears, throwing her arms around Gideon and burying her face in his shoulder.

"It's okay," he whispered as he stroked her hair, "it's all okay."

"I don't know what happened," she whimpered, "I- I just don't know. Gideon," she pulled back, "I don't know who that was. In the ring, that wasn't me. I was…cruel."

"Lily, she hurt you, she hurt your friends, you were angry."

"But I don't get angry," she insisted, "and I certainly don't seek revenge. Never, I have never been that mean to anyone, ever. Gideon, is this what being Dauntless means."

"Of course not, Lily, darling, you just lost your grip for a minute." His voice was shaking and he kept trying to look in her eyes but he couldn't.

"You're lying," she said slowly, "there's something you aren't saying."

"I just," he fumbled for his words, "I didn't recognize you in there. I just keep wondering, did I do this to you? Did I push you too hard?"

"No! Gideon, darling, no."

They both sat in silence, clinging to each other and shaking.

"Today was the last day of stage one," Gideon said, "You won't have to fight again. We can work through this together or just pretend it didn't happen, you're choice, but it will never happen again."

"No, no it won't, it won't happen." She said the words softly, repeating them to convince herself it was true.

"Come on," Gideon helped her stand, "we have to go back to hear the rankings."

"Okay, can we just, just stand here for a minute." She clung to him, her legs were shaking and she felt like if she let go of him she would fall.

"Of course." He pulled her close and held her to his chest. For just a moment, everything was fine; Gideon's strong arms were like a shield, protecting Lily from the pain in her own heart.

When they returned for the rankings, everyone stared at Lily. Not in the cruel and disapproving way they used to, but with fear. She and Gideon sat by Luther, Xavier, and Jackson, the only people who weren't looking at her like she may kill them all at the blink of an eye. Xavier patted Gideon's shoulder and Luther smiled softly at Lily. The smile was tight and he didn't seem to really look at her, just through her.

Jackson leant forward from his seat behind them and whispered, "Luther lost his fight, after you left, he's not going to make the cut."

Lily's breath caught in her throat and her heart dropped. Her only new friend, the only transfer who cared about her, was going to leave. Despite all she'd done to help him. She looked back at Luther, and now she saw the worry, the fear. His lips hands were shaking, and there were tears in his eyes. Xavier was rubbing his back to comfort him, but it didn't seem to help.

"Now that we're all present again," Eric began, "in a moment we will show your ranks on this board. If your name is below the red line, you are cut." On the screen behind him their names popped up, Luther was below the red line.

"In light of recent events," Four took over, "A few of you are being disciplined through rank loss. After taking into account these actions, you new ranks are…" He pushed a button and a few names shifted. Owen's name dropped below the red line, pushing Luther above it. Luther let out a sigh and Lily saw him start to cry. Xavier pulled Luther in and hugged him, ruffling his hair, she had never seen Xavier smile so widely.

Around them, others were rejoicing as well; but, out of the corner of her eye, Lily saw Maya's small figure walking from the training room. She hadn't made it.

"Alright, that's enough," Four held his hand to quiet them, "Congratulations to those of you who passed, but it's not over yet. You still have two more stages, the first of which will begin after lunch. Try not to eat too much, you probably lose most of it anyways."


	23. Chapter 22

**A/N: I had a lot of trouble writing for Lily these past few days, so this chapter is from Gideon's POV. Enjoy =D**

The tension in the hallway was thick as molasses. As he waited to be called, Gideon couldn't believe these were the same people who had been celebrating in the Pit just an hour before. After lunch, everyone had been led to a long hallway and told to sit against the wall, one by one they were being led into a room at the end of the hall, when they would come out they were led past everyone quickly and weren't allowed to talk to anyone. Every person left looking worse than when they came in, it was like they had faced their worst fears in that room. Jackson was the first of Gideon's friends to go through what Gideon had started calling the Gates of Hell in his mind, when he was led out he was shaking and muttering about dogs and rabies.

"Gideon" Laura called, "you're next."

Gideon tried to steady his quaking knees as he stood up, he may not know what was beyond the door, but he wasn't keen to find out. As he headed towards the door he shot Xavier a nervous smile and a thumbs up. Once he was in the room he thought he would feel better, he was wrong. There was a chair like the one in the aptitude test and a tray of vials and needle; he was thoroughly convinced that he was about to be tortured.

"Sit down," Laura directed him.

"Um, what exactly is about to happen?"" He asked. He had always liked Laura, but he had also always been a little afraid of her. He didn't think she'd have any trouble destroying him if she was ordered too.

"You're going to be put in a simulation, very similar to the one from your aptitude test. The simulation will target the part of your brain that creates fear and adapt to trigger those emotions. Your job will be to remain calm and escape the situation as quickly as possible."

"How long should that take?"

"Average time is about 20 minutes."

"Okay, 20 minutes straight of facing my worst fears. Sounds easy enough." He laughed, trying to hide how nervous he really was.

"It should only be one fear at a time, if you're lucky." Laura was in the process of tapping the oxygen out of his needle, a very large needle, "Tilt your head to the side please." Gideon obeyed and she stuck the needle deep into his neck. At first he only felt the pain, then he blacked out completely.

We he woke up, he was in a dark room, possibly one of the storage rooms in the Dauntless basement. There were no windows, across the room he saw a steep wooden staircase leading up to a door. There were a few boxes on the floor, one was open, but it was empty. The only light was from a bare light bulb flickering overhead. He walked slowly around the room, wondering how he wound up down here. His foot hit something and he heard it slosh. Upon further inspection, he realized it was a half-full gasoline can. He figured, as he had no idea why he was here, he should probably leave.

He began towards the door, but was distracted by a scuffling and a squeaking. He turned quickly and saw something dash across the floor into the shadows. Behind him, her heard it again. This time, when he turned, he saw a tail.

"Rats" he whispered quietly to himself. The squeaking and scuffling was getting louder and he could see the shadows moving. They were everywhere. His heart began to race. The rats were surrounding him, starting to emerge from the shadows. They were huge, their beady eyes were glowing in the light and their sharp little teeth were bared. There must have been a hundred of them or more, all between him and the door and moving towards him. One darted out of the shadows and leapt, biting his pants leg. Gideon screamed and shook it off, but others were starting to move in on him too. He began to look all over for anything that could be a weapon. There was a broom against the wall and he grabbed it, swinging it wildly. He tried to remember anything he knew about getting rid of rats, but all he could remember was that they could eat a lot, and these ones seemed intent on making him a feast. He tried to calm himself and remember his training. "Use your surroundings to your advantage" Laura had once told them. His surroundings didn't seem very advantageous right now.

He looked at the gas can to his side, fire would certainly scare the rats long enough for him to get to the door, he just needed something to light it with. His eyes locked on the overhead light. Gideon dunked the broom into the gas, then jumped and jammed the broom handle into the bulb, breaking the glass and exposing the conductor. When he landed he felt and heard a few rats squish under him and he struggled not to vomit. He shoved the gas-covered bristles into the light, just praying for a spark. The broom ignited and he was so happy he wanted to cry; he swung the blazing cleaning tool at the rats and they retreated from the heat. He moved towards the door as quickly as he could, just hoping it was unlocked. He left the burning broom at the bottom of the stairs and ran up them two at a time, flinging the door open.

He woke up in the chair panting, his body ached and he was drenched in sweat.

"18 minutes" Laura said calmly, "not bad, Gideon. You can sit there for a second, catch your breath, whenever you're ready Topher here will lead you out. Topher was, apparently, the guard that had been guiding people down the hall, a big guy with curly dark hair and a face that looked permanently angry.

Gideon took a few deep breaths before standing and following Topher out the door. Topher eventually stopped in the Pit and said, "The rest of your day is free, if you find yourself hallucinating or having panic attacks go to the medical floor and they'll sort you out."

After he left, Gideon looked everywhere for Lily, but couldn't find her, he assumed she was still waiting for her own simulation. He was worried about her, having to go through that, he wished they didn't have to be separated. He eventually made his way back to the dorms, where Xavier and Jackson were sitting on their bunks talking.

"Gideon, dude, we thought you were never coming back." Jackson attempted to kid but he mostly sounded worried.

"Just had to walk around awhile," Gideon said, sitting next to Xavier, "had to clear my head."

"Yeah, that was really rough." Xavier shook his head, "What was in your simulation?"

"Rats, I hate those things, you?"

"Dogs," Jackson said, "big foamy mouthed dogs."

"Man, you guys got easy ones." Xavier looked genuinely jealous.

"Oh yeah, what was yours?" Jackson demanded.

Xavier looked at his feet for a moment before muttering, "I was really old. My body was all brittle and I like couldn't move. And I was just laying in this bed and trying so hard to get up. The only way I could escape the simulation was to eventually just lay there and die."

The other boys were stunned.

"Damn," Jackson swore, "I didn't realize you were so…deep."

"Yeah, well, don't tell anyone." Xavier huffed. He turned to Gideon, "Did you find Lily yet?"

"No, I looked for her but I guess she's still waiting."

"What do you think she'll see?" Jackson asked.

"I don't know, we've never talked about our fears before."

"Well, maybe she'll get something easy." Xavier said, "Like, something she can just run away from or beat up easily."

"If it was so easy, she wouldn't be afraid." Gideon worried allowed.

"Well, just keep the faith buddy." Jackson assured him.

Gideon pondered this for a moment, wondering why it didn't reassure him. He had been worried about Lily all day, ever since her fight. She was slipping and he wasn't sure how to handle it. He found himself thinking aloud,

"What faith?"


	24. Chapter 23

**A/N: Yay, I finally got over my writers block! I hope this is actually as good as I think it is, because I'm starting to think I'm losing it a little o.O**

Lily was beginning to get worried. Four had disappeared into the room at the end of the hall hours ago; every 30 minutes or so he would call someone in, and they never came out. Lily knew that, logically speaking, people were probably just going out a back door so they wouldn't have the chance to reveal whatever was happening behind the Door of Mystery, as Lily had started calling it, but the Amity part of her mind (which sounded a great deal like her mother's voice) was saying that people were probably getting murdered in there.

"Why would they be murdering people?" Luther asked when she raised this concern to him.

"Maybe the Dauntless don't actually accept transfers after all," she said, "maybe they're just toughening us up and then murdering us for like…food or something."

Luther just stared blankly at her.

"Or…you know…maybe not."

"Lily!" She perked up when Four called her name, her insides were bubbling with nerves, but she convinced herself to smile and stay calm.

"Hi, Four." she smiled brightly as he closed the door behind her and she looked around the room, "Ooh, it's one of those simulation chairs. Am I retaking the test or something, because that doesn't make a lot of sense? You know these chairs kind of look like torture chairs. Am I about to be tortured?" She started rambling as she grew more nervous. If she had to take the test again, Four would know she was really Amity. What if they were testing everyone again to root out the non-Dauntless?

"Only mentally." Four said.

"Huh?"

"You asked if you would be tortured. What you are about to undergo may seem like a mental torture. But it won't be painful. You are going to be put in a simulation, similar to the Aptitude Test, which will target your fears. You will have to face your fears and escape or overcome them. This monitor will register your heart rate, when you escape your fear and calm down your heart rate will lower and you will wake up."

"Oh, okay, sounds fun." She smiled again.

Four looked her over curiously, his dark eyes made Lily squirm; it was like he was peering into her soul.

"Get in the chair." He said sternly.

Lily climbed into the chair, squirming a little as Four took out a syringe.

"I'm not drinking the serum?" She asked.

"No, drinking it is too weak, your simulation wouldn't last long enough. I have to inject the serum directly into your bloodstream, through your neck."

"That sounds painful."

"It will be."

"Okay then." Lily tilted her head to the side and winced as Four stuck her with the large needle. The world around her began to fade.

When she woke up she was in a jungle. She had no idea how she had gotten there; she had only ever seen jungles in pictures. As far as she knew, there were none near the city.

"_Where am I", _she thought. The memory of Four and his big needle slowly returned to her.

_Right, simulation, how do I get out again? _She recalled Four telling her about heart rates and escaping her fears. _Okay, and this is a simulation. I'm in charge of it. So I just need to make this something not scary. _

She looked around the jungle, it really didn't seem so bad. It was kind of pretty. Then she saw the web.

A huge spider web was strung between two trees, large enough for her to lay across 3 times over. And it was moving.

She looked up and saw a spider, as big as a dog, scuttling down the web. Lily let out a squeak of fear and closed her eyes.

"_It's not real, it's not real", _she repeated in her mind again and again. After a moment, she dared to peek on eye open, and she screamed louder than she ever had. The spider was les than 6 inches from her face, it's pincers clicking and it's many eyes locked on her.

She closed her eyes again, "_NOT REAL! NOT REAL!" _it felt very real.

"_Calm down, calm down. Think of something happy. Think of kittens, or babies, or Gideon! Or Gideon with a baby kitten! Awwwwww!" _She felt a little better, but she could still hear the spider scuttling around her. She felt something sticky on her arm, and wrapping around her. The spider was staring to bind her in webs. She bit her tongue to keep from screaming. "_Focus, focus. This isn't real. The spider hasn't attacked yet because I'm not letting it. I need to make it go away."_

She opened her eyes and brushed the web from her arm. She picked up a large stick and walked to the web, and began tearing it down. The spider screeched and began to charge her. She turned towards it and held up her hand. She took a deep breath and cried out, "Stop! This is my jungle now! Go away!"

The spider halted, and looked at her, she could swear it tilted its head in confusion; then, it turned and scampered away. Once it was out of sight, Lily could feel herself calming down, and slowly waking up. When she opened her eyes, Four was staring at her with a concerned look on his face.

"So, how'd I do?" Lily asked.

"24 minutes." Four said. "Do you normally get animals to listen to you by shouting at them?"

"Actually, I rarely shout."  
"You were very brave. You can go." Four was looking at her like he thought she might explode, afraid for her life.

Lily stood and rushed out of the room. She wasn't sure what had happened it the simulation, why she had been conscious. Four had seemed shocked by how she got out of the jungle, like it was unusual. She was worried, worried that there was something different about her. Something dangerous. She walked as fast as she could, without running, through the compound and into Tessa's hair salon.

"Tessa, I need to talk to you." She said, trying to sound assertive.

Tessa looked up from where she was cleaning her dye kit, she frowned when she saw Lily. "Okay," Tessa crossed her arms, "talk."

"In private."

Tessa turned and walked to the back of the store, waving for Lily to follow her. She led her into a supply closet.

"Are we supposed to be conscious during our fear simulations?" Lily asked as soon as the door was closed.

"No." Tessa responded, she didn't seem at all surprised.

"Then why am I?"

Tessa stared at her, confused, "You mean you don't already know?"

"No, I don't, so what is it."

Tessa stared at Lily, a look of relief wiping over her face, "I thought… Lily, it is very important you never tell anyone what you can do, and never let on about it either. Not even to Gideon. Especially not to Gideon."

"But why-"

"Never. Okay, whatever is going on, it's your problem, but I will not have you brining my brother into this."

"Okay…but I still-"

"Tell me, tell me you won't say anything to Gideon. Swear."

"I-I swear, I won't tell."

Tessa seemed satisfied with this as she then pushed past Lily out of the closet.

Lily left a few minutes later; still feeling so utterly lost, and now sincerely scared. She suspected that Tessa did not actually know what she was talking about, but she wasn't about to take the chance.


	25. Chapter 24

**A/N: Hey everybody, this chapter is a little different. It's from Eric's point of view. A big thanks to Sheerio4ever for letting me steal Eric's back story from her fan fiction "How Eric Came To Be." You should all go check it out, after you read this chapter of course. ;)**

Eric stalked down the halls of Dauntless, making his way to the conference room. When he arrived at the sliding metal door he placed his hand on a pad and waited for the door to open. On the other side of the door, in the large, windowless cement room, Max Powell was waiting for him. Around the conference table sat the other Dauntless leaders, Whitney and George, as well as Tessa Aserath and Jeanine Matthews.

"You're late." Max scolded.

"My apologize. I was called in to assist Four in the simulation room. Some pathetic Candor transfer pissed his pants in the simulation and couldn't wake up." Eric sat it his chair by Whitney, hoping not to show his fear of Max.

"Well, now that we are all present," Max leaned against the table, "lets hear what news we have. Whitney?"

"I've begun reviewing old simulation tapes, looking for specific character traits. Ability to manipulate the simulations, verbal recognition of where they are, that sort of thing, it's been slow going so far."

"Fine, George? The Abnegation?"

"Don't suspect a thing. They are so busy trying to forget themselves, they don't notice anything else. A little ironic when you think about it. I was also able to get my hands on past aptitude test scores, I'm taking record of all manually entered results as well as situations in which chosen faction and aptitude don't line up."

"Well done. Eric, how's initiation going? Any…candidates?"

"Only the obvious, the Amity girl. I don't really know what to make of her, she too tough to be Amity, but she sure isn't Dauntless either."  
"I don't think so." Tessa interjected, "I've known this girl for nearly 7 years now. She's Amity, through and through. She's just good at playing Dauntless."

"Yes, because all Amity are such good pretenders," Eric snipped, "a trait of Divergence is ability to hide and pretend. What you just said only makes me more suspicious."

"You're talking about Lily Abercrombie, right?" Whitney asked, "I watch her test and fear simulation today. It wasn't very Dauntless, but it also wasn't raising any red flags."

"And she tested into Amity," George added, "automatically."

"She's an Amity in Dauntless." Eric scoffed.

"She's not the first." Tessa said, "Remember Mai? She transferred just last year, tried too at least."

"This girl is not Mai." Eric growled.

"We'll keep an eye on her." Max said exasperatedly, "Tessa, do you have anything to report?"

"The gossip mill is running, people come in to my shop at least every other day talking about Abnegation corruption. No one has dropped the word Divergent yet, but I can speed that process up at your word."

"Not yet," Jeanine said, standing from her chair, "this is a delicate matter, and it's clear this process is going to be slower than I expected. Erudite will release the first warnings of Divergence when I see fit. Now, it would seem that we have nothing left to discuss until you all get your little projects in order. We'll meet again in two weeks to discuss your progress, do not disappoint me."

"Of course not," Max said, using his handprint to open the door for Jeanine, see you in two week Ms. Matthews.

Eric watched as Jeanine strutted down the hallway. He had always hated her pompous attitude, but he yearned to have the same commanding air as her. For an Erudite, she was absolutely terrifying.

"Eric," Max's voice broke him from his thoughts, "about this Amity girl. I want you to keep a close eye on her, find her weakness."

"Of course sir."

"And, if at all possible, don't let her get through initiation. If she is as dangerous as you seem to think she is, I want her gone. Either put enough blocks in her way to make her fail, or put enough pressure on her to make her quit."

"Sir, she's first rank, how exactly am I supposed to make her fail? And as for quitting, she's too attached, she'd sooner jump into the Chasm than quit."

Max fixed him with a cold-hearted stare that made him feel as if all oxygen had left the room. When he spoke, it was with a tone so sharp it could cut steel.

"Then make her jump."


	26. Chapter 25

**A/N Hello Everybody! We're back to Gideon and Lily again =D **

Gideon finally found Lily at dinner that night.

"There you are." He said as he sat down next to her, "I was looking all over for you today, where were you?"

"Oh, I got out of training a little late and then I went to see Tessa, about fixing my hair," she motioned to the fading pink streak, "but she was busy. Then I went and met Luther. We were going to come find you but…" Lily trailed off as she looked over at Luther, who was staring down at his food and picking at it with shaking hands.

"Is he okay?" Gideon asked, already knowing the answer.

"He had it really rough in there. He told me…well he…" she bit her lip as if she didn't want to repeat whatever Luther had told her, "he just got really scared."

Luther didn't seem to notice they were talking about him at all. His face was completely blank. Gideon wish he could do something to help the poor guy, but he wasn't really sure how.

"What kind of scared are we talking? Like, cry for an hour scared, or like pee your pants scared?" He asked.

"A literal mixture of the two."

"Yikes." Gideon's simulation had been rough but he couldn't imagine what Luther had seen.

"And he was in for almost an hour." Lily added.

"That's awful."

Xavier had sat next to Luther, his casual smile fading immediately upon looking at him.

"Luther, are you okay?" Xavier asked.

No response. Luther tried to lift his fork but his hands were shaking too much. Xavier reached out and took Luther's hands in his own, keeping them steady. Luther blinked and his eyes returned from whatever distant horrors they had been seeing. He looked up at Xavier, surprised, as if he hadn't realized he was there until that moment. He smiled softly, Gideon got the feeling that he would be okay.

"What about you?" He asked Lily, "How are you feeling after…you know."

"Huh? Oh, the simulation." Lily seemed distracted, Gideon wondered if she was lost in her own simulation, like Luther was. "It was really no big deal, just a big spider, not exactly traumatic. I got out pretty quick." Lily shrugged and reached for another bread roll, but the way her eyes avoided Gideon, it seemed strange. She only did this when she was mad at him; and he didn't think that he'd done anything this time.

"Are you sure, because you can talk to me about it."

"Yes, Gideon, I'm sure." She had a smile plastered to her face, but her tone was sharp.

"Did I do something, are you mad at me? You're acting strange." Gideon asked.

"No, I'm not mad at you. I'm fine. I just don't feel like talking about the damn simulations!"

Now Gideon knew something was wrong, Lily never swore, ever; and she rarely raised her voice. But he knew pushing her at this point would only upset her more.

"Okay, I'm sorry." Gideon tried to hide the hurt in his voice. He looked over at Xavier and Luther, Xavier had and arm wrapped around Luther and was playfully feeding him off his plate; acting over-excited to cheer Luther up, but staring at him with concern whenever the other boy wasn't looking.

Gideon found himself wishing that he and Lily were like that now; it was how they had always been. He couldn't fathom what had happened in that one simulation to make her so hostile, or what was so bad that she couldn't tell him about it.

"You know, you can tell me about yours. If you want to." Lily said with a soft tone. She looked up at him and she didn't need to speak for him to understand what she was saying, "_I'm sorry, let's not fight." _

"Um, it was rats." He said, grateful that she was speaking kindly to him again, "I was in a basement and there were hundreds of rats between me and the door."

"How'd you get out?"

"I lit a broom on fire."

Lily smiled and leaned up to kiss his cheek, "You're so smart. I probably wouldn't have thought of that."

"Yeah, I mean, it's kind of hard to get your bearings isn't it? You wake up in some weird place with no idea how you got there, then all of a sudden you just have to fight your way out? But, like, you get it." He was blushing a little, he had just realized that he and Lily had never actually discussed their fears. He knew she was afraid of spiders because of the many times she had made him kill them for her, but he had never told her any of his.

"Did you know that rats will swarm people or animals and burrow through their eyes and mouths to get to the softest meats on their bodies?" Jackson threw out. Gideon felt like he was about to be sick, thinking of the image Jackson had put in his head.

"Thanks for that, man." He said, pushing his food away.

"Sorry, bro," Jackson did look legitimately ashamed, "third-wheel syndrome. Or, I guess, fifth-wheel."

"Then why don't you invite one of your many, many, many lady friends to join us?" Luther asked. It made Gideon happy to see him joking again, and he could tell Xavier was relieved too.

"You are exaggerating," Jackson said, "it's not like I have women stock-piled or anything. I am simply a very eligible bachelor who is happy to share all of myself with any interested parties."

"And who is the most interested party today?" Xavier asked.

"Belle, from Amity. So, no question as to why she can't sit with us."

"What happened to Shae?" Xavier asked.

"And Marie." Luther added.

"And Jane." Gideon threw out.

"Wait, back up, Belle?" Lily said, "I remember her, she's the one that was always reading. We all thought she would transfer to Erudite."

"Well she didn't. And she was my doctor-in-training today."

"And she wasn't put off by the fact you were in the infirmary from shock after being chased by imaginary puppies?" Gideon raised an eyebrow.

"They were not puppies! They were big and vicious and had fully grown canines!"

While the rest of the group continued to laugh and joke at Jackson's expense, Gideon saw Lily's eyes start to glaze over, and her face scrunch up in worry. She retreated back into her thoughts, and this time, he didn't try to stop her.

**A/N Just a moment of Self-advertising here. If you want to learn more about Belle, she has her own story. I won't be posting it until this story ends, but it'll be called The Art Of Blending, so like, check it out, if you want….or not *hides***


	27. Chapter 26

**A/N: The last few chapters have been a little ****angsty, so I grant you all some Xavier/Luther fluff. Enjoy =)**

Xavier and Luther sat side by side in the training room, Xavier's arm was wrapped around him, holding him steady. Luther still hadn't been able to get the events of that afternoon out of his head, to be so engulfed in his own fear, it was debilitating.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Xavier asked.

"I don't know. I don't want you to think that I'm…" he trailed off, not sure how to finish his sentence. Xavier probably already thought he was weak, talking about what happened wouldn't change that.

"Luther," Xavier rubbed his back in slow comforting circles, his voice was gentle and caring, "I won't think less of you. Those simulations are the worst, I don't blame you for being shaken."

"I was in there almost an hour, it was awful. I've never been so scared in my entire life."

"What if I told you mine? Would that make you feel better?"

Luther was shocked, Xavier always acted so strong and carefree; he had never considered that he had fears too.

"I suppose, maybe, if you want to." He said.

"Well, in my simulation I was very old. My body was all skin and bones. I couldn't move or call for help. I was hooked up to a bunch of monitors and all I could do was lie there and stared at my vitals. And in order to escape, I had to die."

"Everyone gets old," Luther said, "why are you afraid of it?"

"I always hoped that I would die a hero, the thought of growing old and weak and sick, of not being able to run or jump or even walk, it's terrifying. It's made even more frightening by the fact that it's inevitable. Waking up from the simulation, I couldn't tell myself that none of it was real, because one day it will be." Xavier's eyes were glazed over, as if he were looking out into his future at his own old and broken form.

""Hey, don't worry," Luther gave a half-hearted smile, "You still have plenty of time to get killed while your still young and hunky. After all, this is Dauntless."

Xavier laughed, the light returned to his eyes.

"Okay," he said, "your turn.'

Luther took a deep breath to calm himself, "When I was in school, there was a group of older Dauntless boys who used to beat me up. I was small and because I was a Candor, I annoyed them. In my simulation, I was a little kid again, running from them. Only, as I ran, I grew up, and then I was in the Dauntless compound. They were adults and they were chasing me. They were angry that I had transferred. Eventually, they chased me to the chasm, and grabbed my tie. The started making fun of me for still wearing one, then one of them pushed me over the side of the Chasm. I was dangling by my necktie and I was choking. They told me I could either hang to death or they could drop me, and I had to choose. I kicked and struggled and couldn't get free. Four and Eric had to pull me out of the simulation manually. I was covered in sweat and I had…" He faded out, not wanting to tell Xavier just how poorly his body had responded to the simulation. It was bad enough Xavier knew he had panicked, that he had cried for an hour and he still hadn't calmed down. He didn't need to know about how he had punched Four in the face when he woke up because he thought he was still in the simulation; or how he had woken up in a puddle of his own urine.

"It's okay," Xavier said, "whatever happened, it's okay. You don't have to tell me, but I won't think less of you, no matter what it is."

"Really?" Luther asked.

"Of course not. Whatever happened in that room, it doesn't make you weak. The only thing that would make you weak is if you never go back."

"I just don't know if I can. It was all so awful, I don't want to go back."

Xavier took Luther's hand and pressed their foreheads together, such a gentle motion, but it made Luther's heart skip a beat.

"You can do it." Xavier said, he sounded so sure of it too, "I know you can do this. You're brave, Luther." He placed a soft kiss on Luther's forehead.

Luther had been called strong, stubborn, and aggressive, but never in his life had he actually been called brave. Hearing Xavier say it made his heart melt, he couldn't believe that this strong and confident boy really thought of him as brave, even after all that had happened that day.

"You really believe that?" he asked.

"With all my heart."


	28. Chapter 27

**A/N Longest chapter yet! I'm getting kind of sad, this story will only have 2 or 3 more chapters. Thank you to everyone who as reviewed followed and favorited, you are all the best! I love you all 3 **

The fear landscapes did not get any easier as the week went on, but Lily was quickly learning how to speed the system up. She knew it was probably dangerous to consciously affect the simulations, but she couldn't stand being in the simulations for too long. Her fears had grown steadily worse since the spider, becoming more personal. She had seen herself as a mother, watching her child get hit by a Dauntless train; and she had found herself being swarmed by Dauntless soldiers, calling her an Amity traitor. In one simulation she had watched herself from a distance as the other her, a Lily with short hair and dark make up in a soldier's uniform, killed people she didn't recognize, and she had to fight her other self to escape. But today was her last day before she would begin stage three, and she was determined to make it out quicker than ever. Her rank had dropped five positions because of her times, she refused to go any lower.

Lily had thought about doing some research on simulation consciousness, but the Dauntless didn't have any libraries or public computers. She had thought of asking her parents to look it up for her, on visiting day, but she had been so happy to see them, she forgot all about it.

"_We are so proud of you" her mother had said as she hugged her._

"_You are?" she asked, "I thought you'd be angry with me."_

"_You were true to yourself," her father said, placing a hand on her shoulder, "that is all we have ever wanted for you."_

"_Are you happy here darling?" Her mother asked._

"_It's tough, but I am happy. It's nice here."_

"_Then we're happy for you." Her mother's eyes twinkled and Lily's father's face broke into a huge smile, and Lily knew they were telling the truth._

Lily smiled at the memory. In the end, she was glad she that hadn't shared her worries with her parents. If this…whatever it was, was as bad as Tessa had implied, she didn't need to get her parents involved.

Four didn't speak to her as she sat in the chair; he hardly ever said a word to her anymore. He would announce her time when she came out of the simulation, because she always asked, and then he would send her off. Lily often wondered if it was because of her first simulation, if it had scared him the way it had scared Tessa. He hadn't even chosen her during Capture the flag.

"_You're turn Four, Amity or Candor?" Eric's voice sliced through the air as he and Four looked between Lily and Luther._

_Four sighed in exasperation, "Luther."_

_Luther joined Jackson and Gideon on Four's team, while Lily went to Eric's side with Xavier. _

"_Guess I'm stuck with you then." Eric rolled his eyes._

"_You are underestimating me, I think." She said it kindly, but she stared at Eric with enough intensity to make him shift with discomfort._

"_Whatever." he glared at her suspiciously before addressing the group, "We are going to jump soon, all of you keep up and we'll regroup a quarter mile out."_

_They decided to hind their flag on the top of a ruined building, hanging from an exposed pipe. Lily was put on decoy duty, her and a Dauntless-born named Skylar were supposed to walk around talking loudly about the flag to lead the other team's scouts away from the real location. Lily did not appreciate being used as bait, but she put up with it. _

_Lily didn't get to see any real action that night, but she later heard all about how Luther had made himself a hero after capturing Eric's flag with three stunners in his shoulder. According to Xavier, it was, "The most badass thing I've ever seen!" _

Lily was still a little miffed at Four for that one, at least he would have been smart enough to use her. But she comforted herself with the knowledge that if he had chosen her, Luther wouldn't have gotten to take the flag; and he had needed the boost.

So now she sat in the simulation chair, preparing to go into her final simulation and just praying that she got something easy. Her claustrophobia fear was easy enough; maybe she would get a repeat of that.

She took a deep breath as Four pierced her neck, no longer feeling the sting as she had the first time. She waited with patience as her world faded away.

When she opened her eyes she was in the training room, Gideon was across from her, on his knees. The light around him grew until she saw that, standing behind him, a dauntless soldier was holding a gun to his head. Looking around, she saw other Dauntless soldiers everywhere; she was surrounded.

"Lily, why didn't you tell me?" Gideon asked.

"Tell you what?"

"Gideon Aserath, you are sentenced to death by gunshot for assisting the traitor Lily Abercrombie." The soldier with the gun said.

"A traitor?" Lily asked, "What's going on?"

This felt very real, Lily couldn't remind herself that it wasn't.

"Lily," Gideon cried, "what have you done? Look what you've done to me! Why didn't you tell me?"

All around her, the soldier's raised their weapons and prepared to shoot. They passed her up, closing in on Gideon. In a split second, Lily knew what she had to do. She ran forward and burst through the soldiers, flinging her body over Gideon's and feeling the bullet's tear though her. She felt herself fading out and looked down at Gideon. Her body had done very little to protect him and there was blood trickling from his mouth. The last thing he said as he faded away was, "Why?"

Lily woke up in the chair with tears streaming down her face.

"Gideon!" She screamed thrashing against Four as he tried to calm her.

"Lily, calm down. Gideon is fine, you are fine, it's over." He said, his voice calm and stern.

Lily began to remember where she was and she calmed down a bit. She looked at the heart monitor, her pulse was racing.

"How did I get out? My heart rate is so fast."

"Too fast," Four said, fiddling with the computer, "you were nearing heart attack levels. I had to pull you out."

"You have to send me back in!" She insisted, "I need to try again, to get it right!"

"Lily, you're fine, you didn't fail; but I can't send you back in."

"But, I have to get my rank up!" She pleaded.

"Lily, your rank is fine, you're in fifth, that's not bad at all. Besides, if the simulation had worked correctly you would have come out of it on your own this time, so you're still getting the time. Your best yet, by the way, only eleven minutes."

"Really? So, I'm okay?" She asked.

"Yes, you're okay, for now. You're very attached to Gideon aren't you?"

Lily was thrown back, both by the question and by the emotionlessness of Four's voice.

"Of course I am," She said, "I love him."

"You may want to work on that." Four said, "It's not information you want your enemies to have."

"I don't have any enemies." She said.

Four looked at her for a moment, he almost looked sad, before responding, "Sure you don't. You may go."

Lily was a little disturbed by that, the way he said "sure you don't" as if he knew something she didn't... But she didn't dwell on any of it too much, right now all she cared about was finding Gideon.

Gideon had told her he was going with Xavier to the tattoo shop today, so she decided to wait for him there. When she arrived, Gideon, Xavier, Luther, and Jackson were all in chairs.

"Lily!" Jackson called out, waving and smiling brightly, "How you doing girl?"

"I'm good," she smiled, "Tori, would you mind taking a break from sticking needles is Gideon's arm for a minute? I need him."

Tori turned off her ink gun and went to find something else to occupy her time. As soon as she was gone, Lily sat in Gideon's lap and kissed him hard on the mouth. She usually wasn't this public with Gideon, only ever sharing light pecks or holding hands around friends, but she didn't care now. She just needed to be reminded that he was real and he was here and he was alive.

"Hello to you too." He chuckled when she pulled away.

"I love you." She said and threw her arms around him.

"I love you too. Are you okay?"

"My simulation was just really rough today." She said, her face buried in his neck.

"Aw," he held her closer, softly rubbing her hair, "It's okay baby, I'm here. You're safe."

They held each other for a few more minutes before she pulled away and asked, "What are you getting done? All of you?" She looked around at the guys.

Jackson was just getting his application pad removed, revealing a black heart with a crack in it over his left pectoral.

"Pretty sweet right?" He asked, smirking.

"I don't know, it's hard to imagine you with a broken heart." She said.

"It's not my heart," he said, "it's representative, of all the hearts I have broken."

"I don't think that's something you want to proudly display, bro." Xavier laughed, "Besides, mine is way cooler."

Xavier was sitting backwards in his chair, a huge flame pattern covering his back.

"Wow, you really went all out didn't you?" Lily raised her eyebrows. The tattoo looked nice, but it seemed like overkill, Lily thought.

Luther had opted for a traditional needle point tattoo, Lily couldn't really make out what it was yet.

"What about you sweetheart?" She asked Gideon.

Lily climbed off Gideon to see his arm. On his right bicep were two roses, entwined with each other. One was black and thorny, with red blood dripping from the thorns. The other was soft and white, with no thorns. If you looked closely, the white one seemed to be holding the black one up, supporting it, with its leaves wrapped like arms around the stem, hugging it.

"It's beautiful." She whispered.

"I was thinking of you when I designed it," Gideon blushed, "do you really like it?"

"I love it." She grinned, "So, is the white rose supposed to be me then?"

"Yes."

Lily smiled wider than she had in weeks and kissed him again, putting all her passion and love into the kiss. No one had ever done something so devoted and permanent for her, it was a thrilling feeling.

"This feels real." She whispered.

"It is," Gideon assured her, "my love for you will always be real. Forever."


	29. Chapter 28

**A/N: It's fear landscape time! My editor squealed for a full two minutes after reading this so apparently it's ****feels-y. Enjoy.**

**TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions/depiction of assault/abuse.**

The final test was here. Today, Lily and the other initiates would enter their fear landscape for the first time, and Lily was beginning to believe that no fear she faced in her landscape could be as bad as her nerves beforehand. The test would take place in reverse alphabetical order, just like the choosing ceremony had; which meant that Lily would once again be going last. Her eyes shifted to the room above the simulator, where Gideon's father, Daniel, was sitting with Max, Eric, and the other leaders. Daniel looked down to where she and Gideon stood and he smiled and waved. This relieved some of Lily's nerves, until she saw Eric. His cold eyes pierced her as he looked right at her, his blank expression flinching temporarily into a heartless smirk. Lily took a deep breath and directed her attention to Four, who was reminding them of how the fear landscape would operate, while Laura set everything up. When Lily had gone into the sample landscape it hadn't been terribly difficult. The woman who had surrendered her fears to them was afraid of lions, and Lily was not. She had actually had a lot of fun with the large cats.

But this time, her fear was real. Not jut the fears she would face, but her fear of what she may reveal. Between Four and Tessa, Lily had been living in paranoia for the past week, terrified of letting on about her simulation resistance, her test results, and how close she and Gideon were. She knew that Gideon could tell something was wrong, she could see it in the sad looks he gave her when she would pull her hand from his or shrug his arm off her shoulder. She wanted to tell him everything, but her final simulation had convinced her that he could never know the truth.

Lily wondered if this was how things would have to be from now on, if keeping Gideon safe would mean lying to him. She had always hated lying; she only ever did it if it was to protect someone.

"_No," _she thought, "_I won't lie any more. After today, once we are both secured as members, and they aren't watching me anymore." _Her eyes shifted back to Eric, "_Once it is safe, I'll tell him the truth."_

But something about Eric's gaze made Lily question if a safe time would ever truly come.

The landscapes began and she watched as Xavier fell through the sky and Jackson fought off vicious dogs. She found herself crying tears of joy as Luther stood his ground in his first fear, fighting off the people chasing him and making it through his landscape even faster than Jackson. She cried even harder afterwards, when he threw himself into Xavier's arms and they laughed and hugged and kissed. They were so happy just to know that they made it; Lily hoped she and Gideon would get to rejoice like that soon too.

After nearly three hours, Veronica, Lily, and Gideon were the only ones left .The rankings had Sierra, the first jumper, in first place at seventeen minutes, followed by Xavier, a Dauntless-born name Skylar, Luther, Jackson, Rod, and Blair was in last at twenty-seven minutes. Veronica was in the landscape with twelve fears down, Lily never would have expected her to be afraid of so much, and she had been in for twenty minutes. When she entered her next fear, Lily saw her face change, she looked like she had been in this place before, wherever she was. She shrunk back, curling up, then her body jerked as if she had been hit. She fell to the ground and was clawing against an invisible attacker. Lily tried to see the screen the leaders were watching in their observatory, she could make out the figure of a man on top of Veronica.

"Please," Veronica cried, "please not again. Not tonight, please. Please, stop."

Lily looked away; she didn't like seeing anyone like this, friends or enemies. She didn't see how Veronica escaped the man in her mind, but one minute later she was out; coming in just ahead of Rod.

Gideon prepared himself, taking deep breaths and shaking himself out. He glanced at Lily and she must have looked worried, because he smiled and said, "It's all going to be okay, darling. I'll see you on the other side." With that, Four called his name and Gideon winked before stepping up to be injected.

Lily's eyes darted between the screen and Gideon as he went through his landscape. It began with the rats, just like his first simulation. She saw him quickly blaze his way through them and stumble through the door, only to find himself in a small closet with no door. He found a loose floorboard and stomped through it, falling through the floor. When he landed on his feet, the building didn't stop falling. He ran but it continued to collapse around him. He hid under a table until it was over, but found himself too weak to rise. He stumbled and crawled, forcing himself to move, He stood, but tripped and doubled over, vomiting on the ground and fainting. He woke again, standing on shaky legs. He looked around, Lily could see other people on the screen but couldn't make out their faces.

"Help me." He said, "Help me, please!"

The people around him were speaking, Lily could tell that, but she couldn't hear what they were saying.

"Please, please don't do this! Why are you doing this?"

The scene on the screen changed, Gideon stood up straight again, but the people were back; and they were armed.

"What are you doing?" Gideon asked, his voice wavering, "Tess, Mom, Dad, Lily, what are you doing?"

The figures, his family, Lily now realized, pointed their guns at him. At the last second, he threw himself to the ground and the guns fired. His family disappeared and only one figure was left. On the ground was Lily, a pool of red around her. Gideon saw her and ran to her side, falling to his knees beside her.

"Lily," he sobbed, "Lily no, what have I done. Lily. Lily!"

Gideon clutched her lifeless body to his chest. Her hair was long, like it used to be in Amity, and her dress was as red as the blood now pouring from her chest.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, "I'm so sorry. This is all my fault."

Figures began to reappear, in the same place as his vanished family, but were now faceless Dauntless soldiers. Gideon glared up at them.

"You did this," they said, "You brought her to Dauntless, you knew we would have to get rid of her."

Gideon's body shook, and he growled, "She was innocent, you monsters." Then, with a wrathful yell, he grabbed Lily's gun and turned on the Dauntless soldiers, firing on them one by one until they were all lifeless on the ground.

"No," Gideon whispered, "You did this."

He woke, his body still shaking, and ran to Lily, holding her tight. Lily squeezed him close to her, but her body was tense. She could see the leaders were watching them, and none of them seemed pleased.

"You got the high score," Lily said, "fifteen minutes and forty-eight seconds."

"It doesn't matter," he said, "you're still here. That's all I care about."

"Don't say that." She tensed, looking nervously at the leaders. Daniel was only looking mildly concerned, but the rest of the leaders ranged from very angry to complete outrage. They were whispering amongst themselves. Lily couldn't hear them, but she could tell that whatever they were saying, it wasn't good.

"But it's true," Gideon assured her, "you are the most important thing in my life. You are the only thing that matters."

**A/N: …I'm sorry….o_o**


	30. Chapter 29

**A/N TA-DA! Welcome to, Lily's fear landscape! **

Lily pulled away from Gideon's grasp, her eyes locked on the leaders. The way that they were whispering to each other and looking down at them made her feel as if her landscape had already begun.

Her eyes didn't leave the leaders until she was induced and her vision faded. When Lily awoke, she was alone. She looked around, allowing her memories to return to her. She thought to herself, "_I am alone in a familiar place, what would a Dauntless do?" _

She chose to start moving, making her way into the compound. There was no one, anywhere. Even the Pit was completely empty. Lily made her way out to the train and jumped on, convinced that she needed to keep moving. As she rode the train through the city, she did not see a soul. The entire city was abandoned.

Lily had not experienced this simulation before, but she knew what it was. Ever since she was very young, and she had gotten lost in one of the fields, she had been afraid of isolation. She realized that she would not find anyone in the city, but she had no idea how to move out of this fear. How does one escape loneliness?

Lily knew she had to do something; she had to keep her time down. So, when the train went by Amity, she jumped. Lily ran through the fields, but did not stop when she reached the edge. She ran past the city borders, only to then find herself running back through the Candor sector. She halted, the dread beginning to sink in. She couldn't leave, she had not idea what was outside the city, and there was no escape.

Lily began to panic; she would never get out of this. She couldn't fight it and couldn't run from it, this city would be her prison forever. She forced herself to breath and calm down.

"_You wouldn't be in here if you couldn't escape, remember?" _she thought, "_You just need to figure out how."_

Lily looked around hoping for a clue.

"_You have to calm down." _She remembered. "_When you calm down it goes away."_

Lily sat down on the ground, crossing her legs and closing her eyes. She concentrated on her breathing, counting out each inhale and exhale as she felt her heart rate drop.

For a moment, Lily was relaxed and everything felt perfect.

Then the world around her crumbled away, and she opened her eyes to nothingness.

For a moment, Lily thought she had fainted,

"_Don't be stupid, if I had fainted I wouldn't be thinking about how I had fainted and was currently in the process of being unconscious."_

Lily reached her hand out and realized, she was lying on her back in a coffin-like box. Pushing hard on the top, she felt it creak a little. There was something heavy above it.

"_Claustrophobia," _She thought, "_this is an easy one." _

That's when she heard the scuttling, and saw the walls of the box begin to move.

"_Oh no, not this. Please not this."_

The spiders began to creep over her, small hairy spiders crawling all over her face and in her hair. She was covered in a moving blanket of arachnids. She wanted to scream but she was sure that if she opened her mouth they would crawl in. Lily began to thrash and kick at the top of the box and she screamed in her mind, "_BREAK!"_

The wooden top splintered and she pushed her way out, the spiders immediately disappearing as she found herself back in Amity. Sarah and David were standing in front of her.

"Lily," Sarah said, "You lied to us."

"You did," David said, "why would you do that?"

Lily's aunt walked up behind her children and gave Lily a heart broken look.

"We are so disappointed in you." She said, "How could my sister have raised someone like you."

Next thing Lily knew, there were Candors everywhere, shouting at her, "Liar! Liar!"

This was not only freaking Lily out, but it was also really embarrassing. Her Candor family members had always made her uneasy, with their robotic behavior. Luther didn't frighten her, because he was Dauntless at heart, but the true Candors sort of terrified her. It was not a fear she liked to admit.

Lily mustered up all her courage as the Candor began to surround her, she inhaled deeply before firmly stating, "Oh, get over it!"

"_Please work please work." _She prayed.

All around her the Candor stuck up their noses and walked away, shooting her disapproving looks as they left.

The scene changed again and she was on the train. Jackson, Xavier, and Luther were with her, all preparing to jump, she looked over the edge. It was too high; she was frozen to the spot and knew she would never make it.

Luther looked over at her with one eyebrow raised. _"No, fake Luther." _She reminded herself.

"You're not going to make it." Fake-Luther said.

"Yeah, you're too weak." Fake-Jackson agreed.

"You should have stayed in Amity." Fake-Xavier told her.

Lily remembered this fear, and how to beat it. As everyone continued to tell her what a failure and a weakling she was, she gathered up her mixed nerves, looked down at the ten-foot drop, and jumped.

She landed on the Dauntless platform, she was holding the hand of a child.

The little girl had dark brown hair and striking blue eyes, she reminded Lily of Gideon's sister.

"I'm going to jump on the train, mommy!" She giggled and broke free of Lily's grasp.

"Daisy, no!" Lily cried, chasing after the child. _"Daisy?"_ She thought, _"When did I name her that?"_ She knew how this one ended, her daughter would jump and fall under the train if she didn't catch her, Lily ran as fast as she could, willing the child to be slow. Her simulation obliged slightly and time seemed to slow down. She leapt for the little girl and caught her, pulling her away just as the train passed.

The child disappeared and Lily was in the Dauntless dorms, surrounded by initiates. It wasn't just the transfers, but everyone who had been there that year. Fake-Veronica was straight ahead of her and she sneered, "Stupid Amity, you shouldn't be here."

They began to surround her. She saw Fake-Luther who jeered, "Go back to Amity, pansy-cake!"

Everyone began laughing and shoving her. It was just like in the dorms the day they attacked Maya, except now Maya was attacking her. All her friends were coming after her. The shouts grew louder, "Amity! Pansy! Loser!"

"_I hate this part." _She thought, knowing what needed to be done. Lily began throwing punches and kicks, steadily knocking each and every one of them out. Fortunately, Fake-Gideon wasn't in this one. Lily had guessed awhile back that it was because not even her sub-conscious questioned Gideon's faith in her.

When she had successfully knocked them all out, she looked around. The scene changed once more and she was in the Pit. Her breath caught in her throat as she remembered this simulation. She heard gunshots and looked, seeing exactly what she knew she would. About ten feet away, was Lily; only she was wearing tight black leather and dark makeup. Her long blonde hair and been sheared short and dyed blood red. Worst of all, she was firing a gun. The people she fired at were just shadows, but Lily could see them falling as Other-Lily's bullets hit them.

Lily ran at Other-Lily, tackling her to the ground and knocking the gun from her hand.

She landed one square punch to Other-Lily's jaw and scolded, "Shooting people is not polite!"

Other-Lily cackled, Lily looked into her eyes and saw they were pure black, no irises or whites to be seen. "You wanted to be Dauntless, well here you are. We do not believe in manners. This is what you will become Lily, you're already on your way." Other-Lily said, her voice cruel and smooth.

"Never." Lily said, "You're a liar."

"That's true." She smirked, "but I wouldn't be saying it if you didn't already believe it. "

Lily needed to shut this woman up, before she revealed too much.

"_It's not real,"_ she reminded herself, "_Anything you do doesn't count in the real world."_

So she took the gun from the floor and pressed it to Other-Lily's temple.

"I will never be you." She said firmly. She thought she would have to shoot her, but it seemed her words were enough, because the gun dissolved and so did Other-Lily.

Lily was relived, even in a simulation she didn't want to kill anyone.

The new room she was in was pitch black, suddenly illuminated by a single light. Gideon knelt under it, the soldier with the gun behind him. Lily would not let this simulation end like before. But, just like last time, her heart was in her throat and she was having trouble remembering that it was all fake.

She knew she needed to run, to get the gun away from Gideon's head, but her feet wouldn't move. She couldn't break free and she realized, this was a fear she had to face. Not fight or flee, but just watch it play out. She stood and stared as the other soldiers appear, calling out her crimes and Gideon's and as Gideon pleaded for his life.

"Stop!" She cried, praying it would work, "Why are you punishing him? He didn't do anything."

"He taught you to fight," The soldier behind Gideon said, "he allowed you to infiltrate our headquarters. He is as much a traitor as you are, and now you both must die."

Lily fought against her own feet, trying so hard to break free. Only once the soldiers were past her was she able to run, breaking through them. This time she didn't just throw herself on Gideon. She fought the soldiers, trying to push them away.

"Run Gideon!" She shouted, but the gunshots rang and they fell. She looked into her lovers dying eyes once again and her heart was breaking.

"You tried to save me." He choked out.

"Of course I did," she said, tears streaming down her face, "I'll always try to save you."

The scene faded and Lily awoke. She looked at the clock; her time was only 20 minutes. She let out a sigh of relief. She had made it.

Lily was only able to relax a few seconds before she was being yanked from her chair. She found herself face to face with Eric, his large hand gripping the front of her shirt.

"You failed, Amity." He smirked.

She pushed him away, she saw Gideon trying to run to her, but his father held him back.

"No I didn't, my scores have been good all around. I passed." She said it all as if it were a question.

"You cheated, you prepared for initiation before it began, you said so in your landscape. You and your boyfriend are hereby Factionless." Eric's eyes burned with a wild satisfaction. He turned to walk away and security officers grabbed her and Gideon to lead them off.

"Wait! Stop!" Lily protested.

"Get the hell off her!" Gideon shouted at her guards while fighting his own.

The leaders were leaving, except Daniel who was just standing there looking heart broken.

"Max," he pleaded, "there must be another way."

"Your son broke the rules." Max said, "He's expressed willingness to break any rule when I comes to this girl. It's over, Daniel."

Eric was standing by the door, Lily caught his eye and he grinned at her. She felt rage boil inside of her, worse even than when Veronica had attacked her and Maya. She didn't just want to hurt Eric; she wanted to annihilate him. She had to do something, they had worked so hard, and Lily wouldn't let it end this way.

"I challenge you!" She screamed at Eric.

As soon as she said it she regretted it. Fight Eric, she couldn't. She could hardly beat the initiates, but it was too late now. So she stood up straight and hardened her expression, hoping to convince everyone she knew what she was doing.

Eric raised his hand to halt the guards.

"What?" He chuckled, "You want to fight me? Do you have a death wish?"

"No, because I know I'll win." She said, holding his gaze, "Fight me, and if you win I'll leave Dauntless forever, but if I win, I get to stay. Gideon too.'

Eric threw his head back and laughed, his harsh voice chilling her to the bone.

"Alright, I'm always up for a little wager. How about in the training room say, now? Same rules as stage one, no surrendering."

"Deal, and the leaders will judge."

"Very well." Eric smirked at Max, who shrugged lightly, seemingly not amused.

"Lily, are you crazy?" Gideon shouted. She had never seen such terror in his eyes.

"It's okay," She smiled at him and kissed his cheek, "I can win this. I learned from the best after all."

She followed Eric out of the room, hoping to God that she would come back.

**A/N Omigosh only one more chapter. I am freaking out. In case you ****lost track and it was bothering you, Lily's fears are**

**1\. Isolation**

**2\. Claustrophobia**

**3\. Spiders**

**4\. Candor**

**5\. Being doubted/underestimated**

**6\. Losing a child in Dauntless**

**7\. Being attacked/ganged up on**

**8\. Becoming a bad person in Dauntless**

**9\. Losing Gideon.**

**and Gideon's fears are,**

**2\. Entrapment**

**3\. Building falling on him**

**4\. Losing his strength**

**5\. Disease**

**6\. Being Abandoned**

**7\. Betrayal**

**8\. Losing Lily.**

**Kthnxbai. =)**


	31. Chapter 30

**A/N: Oh my god, last chapter! **

Gideon paced the floor, looking up at the doors every time he heard a noise. When Max had told Gideon to stay behind as Lily fought Eric, Gideon had protested, and eventually was restrained by the guards. All the other initiates had been dismissed to dinner. When Xavier, Luther, and Jackson had stayed behind, Four had them removed. Then Four and Lauren left too.

"Son, it's going to be okay." Gideon's father tried to comfort him.

"How is it going to be okay?!" He shouted, glad to have someone to scream at. "She's fighting Eric, Dad! She'll be lucky to make it out of this in one piece!"

"Gideon," his father placed a calming hand on his shoulder, "you have never wavered in your faith in Lily before. Now is not the time to start."

Gideon took a deep breath, trying to remain calm. He did not want to lash out at his father, not after he had stood up Max and refused, "to take part in this ridiculous playground dispute."

Gideon was just starting to calm down, when the doors were flung open. Luther burst into the room, tripping over his own feet as he did so.

"It's over." Luther panted, "It's over, she-"

Gideon did not wait to hear the rest of Luther's sentence. He bolted out of the room, taking the steps to the Pit three at a time until he reached the infirmary. He skidded to a halt at Lily's bedside. Her face was bruised and her nose was broken. Her chest was wrapped in bandages and one of her legs was in a brace. She appeared to be unconscious. Gideon knelt by her bedside, running his finger through her golden hair.

"Lily, Lily, say something, please." Gideon sobbed, "God, Lily, why would you do that? You stupid, brave, ridiculous…" Gideon couldn't go on. His voice caught in his throat and he buried his face in Lily's shoulder.

"I won."

Gideon looked up as he heard the tiny voice.

Lily's blue eyes were gazing down at him. Or, more likes squinting at him, really. They were very swollen. But, even through the swelling, Gideon could see they were shining with light.

"I won." She said again. Her voice was hoarse, but she still managed a light giggle.

"You won?" Gideon could not believe it, there was no way Lily had won. "But, how? I mean, look at you. You're a mess."

"Thanks." Lily laughed, "You should see Eric."

Gideon followed Lily's gaze to a bed at the other end of the infirmary. He had paid no attention to the other beds when he came in, and he was shocked by what he saw. Lying across the room was Eric, although he did not look like Eric at all. His face was covered in bruises, with a patch over one eye and a broken nose. His arm was in a cast, strung up in a hanging sling. Wires covered his face and chest, monitoring his vitals. There was a blood transfusion and an I.V. in his arms. He looked on the verge of death, much better than Lily.

"How on Earth did you do all of that?" Gideon asked.

"It was easy once I learned his style. He's a pretty forward fighter. Once I learned to stay behind him, I was okay. He broke my ribs though, and popped my knee. The doctor says I'll need to keep the brace on for a few days."

Gideon looked between Lily and Eric; he couldn't find words to describe what he was feeling. He was beyond amazed with Lily. She was more fantastic now than she had ever been. Finding himself at a loss for words, Gideon began to laugh. It began as a breathy chuckle, which then grew into an uproar of joy. Lily stared at him like he was crazy, before she too began to laugh.

"Ouch," Lily gripped her ribs, "laughing hurts."

Gideon stopped laughing immediately.

"I'm sorry." He said. "I am just so happy that you're okay."

"So am I." she smiled. "I have no idea what I was thinking when I challenged him. Actually, now that I think about it, I know exactly what I was thinking. I was thinking I couldn't let all our hard work go to waste."

"So you thought risking your life was a good idea." Gideon asked.

"I wasn't planning on risking my life." She said, "I figured if things got too bad I could just pretend to black out, but I didn't have to."

Gideon couldn't help himself, he laughed again. He leant in to kiss Lily, letting his laughter die on her lips. The sweet relief was indescribable. She was here, and he hoped that she would stay here forever. It was like all his wildest dreams had come true. He had found this perfect woman, strong and sweet and brave and smart, and completely unaware of just how happy she made him. To realize that he would get to spend the rest of his life trying to make her as happy as she made him, although he would be lucky to bring her even half as much joy, it was all he thought he would ever need.

When Lily was released from the infirmary, two days later, Max came to see here off.

"I want to congratulate you, Lily." He had said. "You have truly proven yourself as a Dauntless. It is my pleasure to inform you that your act of bravery has awarded you the first place rank in you initiation class. As you are first rank, it is tradition for me to offer the position of Dauntless leader in training."

"Thank you, Sir." Lily grinned. "And, thanks for not kicking Gideon and me to the curb. I appreciate your offer, but I'm really not interested in a leadership position. But, Gideon was second, right? I'm sure he would love the position."

Max looked down at the Amity transfer with such curiosity. He had tried for almost two months now to figure her out, and he still did not quite understand her. She was clearly Amity, but these spurts of bravery confused him. It was not until he saw her walk away with Gideon, the tall boy carrying her to keep her off her injured leg, that he finally understood.

"We'll get her," Eric said to him, "it won't be long before she screws up again."

"Leave it alone, Eric." He sighed.

"What? But sir, she-"

"Is not one of them," Max interrupted, "she's just a lovesick Amity."

"No she is not! Look what she did to me!"

"Yes, it is quite pathetic, isn't it? But, I suppose, that is the price you pay for underestimating someone. Anyone can learn to fight, Eric, and the Amity are fiercely loyal. You should have anticipated this."

"But, but I, and she…" Eric stammered

"Leave it be Eric. I won't have you wasting precious time on one star struck transfer. Jeanine is ready to move forward with the plan, and so am I. That is what you will focus your energy on. If I find out you have so much as looked at Lily, Gideon, or anything associated with them, I will be sure to see you returned to this bed. Am I understood?"

"Uh, yes, Sir." Eric's eyes were wide and his mouth hung open like a fish.

As Max walked away, he found himself chuckling slightly. Who would have imagined that one little Amity could be so much trouble?

The next several months were like magic for Lily. She and Gideon had each been given their own apartments, but she had moved most of her belongings into his home less than a week after being assigned. They used her apartment as a sort of gathering space for friends and family, and it was rarely empty. Xavier, Jackson, and Luther were over all the time, and Jackson usually brought a "friend". Gideon and Lily's parents visited often, and Lily would babysit Winnie after school most days. Even Tessa had started being nicer to her, although Lily still worried about her from time to time.

Lily had begun an apprenticeship at the tattoo parlor, and Gideon was working as his father's assistant. Everything was finally coming together.

One day, while walking to work, Lily saw an Erudite newspaper that caught her eye. She paused and dropped Gideon's hand as he kept walking. The headline read, _**Divergents: Threat to the Factions, Hiding in Plain Sight.**_

"_Divergent," _Lily thought,_ "what is that?"_

She reached for the newspaper as she heard Gideon call out, "Lily, you're going to be late for work!"

"Alright, I'm coming darling." Lily rushed to catch up to him, leaving the newspaper on the rack, forgotten.

**To Be Continued…**

**Foreword: Thank you so much to everyone who has read/faved/followed/reviewed. You are all wonderful people who make my heart soar. **

**And for those of you who want more of then characters, there is a sequel in the works! The sequel is also going to take elements from my spin-off story The Art of Blending and will follow closely with another fic, Faction Before Love. The first chapters of both of these stories are already posted. Art of Blending will have regular updates but Faction before love is on temporary hiatus due to some communication issues with my co-author, which we will have fixed very soon (time-zones are such a problem). So yeah, go check those out and follow my page, the sequel to Brave Hearts will be up as soon as those two are finished and it will be called The Drums of War.  Warning, it breaks canon ALOT. Like, you'll have to just pretend Insurgent/Allegiant don't exist yet. But I hope you all read it because I've had so much fun bringing Gideon and Lily and all thereat to life for you.**

**Again, thank you all,**

**RJ**

_P.S. Shout out to sheerio4ever for reviewing every single chapter 3_


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